How You Can Learn to Love Yourself

September 23, 2012 by 28 Comments
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How You Can Learn to Love Yourself

 

You and I are uniquely designed for such a time as this; for a specific purpose. We all have different personalities, gifts, skills, talents, preferences and experiences. God never intended for us to be a clone of someone else. We should embrace, love and accept the masterpiece He has created each of us to be.

We all remember the experiences from when we grew up from childhood into adulthood as we go through different experiences; some are positive and some are negative. Apart from how or why we go through some of these experiences; God can use them to our benefit.

These experiences help to shape and mold us into the people that we become. As we grow and develop as individuals, we gain a concept of who we are and what we were created to do and achieve. Gaining a concept of who we are and loving ourselves unconditionally empower us to live an authentic lifestyle.

Embrace Who You Are

We must appreciate ourselves. Although it may not be a reality for some, when we look in the mirror, we should see one of the best people we know. It is important that we know ourselves better than we know anyone else, all our flaws included and be able to see ourselves as an unique and beautiful individual, empowered by God to succeed in every area of our lives.

We were wonderfully made by a loving God who does all things well. He purposely made us for a time such as this. Though others may resemble you and play some of the same roles as you, there is only one you; and only you can do what you have been created to do.

Knowing and Loving Who We Are

When we know and when we love ourselves as we are gives us the ability to live freely. When we take the time to appreciate the gifts and the abilities placed within us, we can appreciate the gifts and talents of others.

Taking the time to discover and develop the things that we are good at and interested in helps to nurture and cultivate our abilities so that we are always striving to be the best we can be for ourselves as well as for others.

Sometimes we run into challenges as we try to embrace our self image on our journey to self-realization. I dealt with a lot of insecurities when I was young; I still remember how uncertain I was in some situations. It almost prevented me from discovering the life that I was born  to live and to know God’s plan for my life.

I was always seeking after the approval of others; as I learned to walk in the image of Christ and see myself the way God sees me, I started to overcome many obstacles step by step.

While we need to be able to relate to others and enjoy their company, we also must learn to do so without being oppressed by their opinions. We never should be in bondage to other people, because that is what it is.

I am so glad that God showed me a way out; He will do the same for you. Although there are times when it tries to return; you and I need to remind ourselves that we are free. Through all this self-realization and acceptance, I was able to make a quality decision.

Either I was going to remain the insecure person I had been for years, or I was going to be insecure in who I was. I chose the latter, and once I started on my new journey toward self-acceptance and self-love, I began to focus on fulfilling my God-given purpose.

Eliminate Being Critical

When we are critical or when we are overly critical this means that we have a negative outlook on life. We tend to look at others and everything with fault finding, harsh accusations, humiliating attitudes and a tendency to unfairly judge ourselves as well as others.

Critical people tend to look down on everyone in a negative way in an attempt to build themselves up. The word critical actually means to find fault or to judge with severity, often times way too fast.

Being critical is opposite to God’s nature. He does not focus on the negative aspects of anyone and anything. He is love, and His very nature is to see the best in everyone and every situation. Therefore, we should not be quick to find fault, but to believe the best.

We do not have to be naive and unrealistic. However we can choose to see things from a positive perspective that agrees with God.

When we begin to read the Bible on a regular basis and understand God’s character, our thoughts will agree with Him. We will begin to understand that if we are to walk with God, we must agree with His plan. God can, and will, use everything He has placed on the inside of us for a specific purpose.

You can subscribe to The Daily Choice which is a SPIRITUAL Devotion that helps you to make the right choices in your life by clicking here

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What Report Do You Believe?

September 9, 2012 by 34 Comments
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What Report Do You Believe?

Everybody is going to encounter problems in life, even the person who is in right standing with God. We can expect it because God said so in Psalm 34:19, but God promises also that He will be there for us and that He will rescue us. Not only will God deliver us, He wants to deliver us!

The state of the economy has played a significant role in the lives of many people over the last few years. People have lost their jobs and homes and some have diminished or completely emptied their life’s savings. Just watching the news can trigger some hopelessness.

Even though the reality is that the economy has affected our lives, dwelling on it won’t change the situation. We can’t be moved by things we see, like high gas prices, closing businesses, and negative bank balances. Our focus should be on the One who can change it all.

There is a lot of darkness in the world now. And if the only thing we’re feeding off of is negative television, negative news reports, and negative people, we’re going to be negative.

Positive Options

Thank God there are positive options also available through television, radio, music, books, and even magazines. When we take in negative information, we are influenced by it and ultimately participate in it by complaining and finding faults in others.

Let’s have a look at the story of Caleb in Numbers 13 and 14. Moses and the Israelites were traveling through the desert in search of the Promised Land. God told Moses that Canaan was the place designated for His people to inhabit. He asked Moses to send spies to inspect the land and its people. The land was already rich in resources and filled with everything they could possibly want or need.

When the twelve spies returned, they confirmed that the land was indeed flowing with milk and honey. The grapes were sweet and ripe and everything was plentiful. But soon their report became flooded with doom and gloom about the people who lived there.

All they could focus on was how big the people were. As a result, the spies feared they would be destroyed. They described the people in Canaan as giants! Rather than seeing themselves equipped for potential battle, the spies described themselves and their own people as small, defeated grasshoppers. The Israelites heard the report and began to stir. They constantly complained and were overcome by fear.

However Caleb, one of the spies, had a different report. He saw the same land and the same people the other spies saw, but he chose to see things from a positive perspective. Numbers 13:30-32

But the people were overcome with fear and began complaining to and about Moses. Rather than accepting the hope that Caleb provided, they chose to believe the negative report of the other spies.

Have You Missed Out?

How many blessings have we missed out on by choosing to focus on the negative? I believe one of the most valuable lessons we can learn from this story is the value of choosing a positive perspective. Had the Israelites chosen to believe Caleb’s report, they would have entered into the Promised Land in God’s timing.

Instead, they opted to believe all the negative things they heard, and, as a result, they were overtaken with fear.

The perspective we choose to take on is by which our circumstances generally determine the type of life we will lead and the results we will achieve. The results the Israelites received would have been far better had they chosen to trust Caleb’s optimistic perspective.

Instead they bought into the negative report, complained, and remained ungrateful. Canaan flowed with milk and honey just as God said. The spies confirmed that it was filled with everything they could even need or desire. Sure there were giants, but as Caleb reminded them, God was on their side. Their victory was guaranteed!

Being positive is a choice. We choose to see the glass as half full or we can choose to see it as half empty. Either way, it’s the same glass. Caleb, as well as Joshua, saw the glass half full while the other 10 spies saw it as half empty.

These great men of faith were able to see beyond the obstacles and embrace the destiny God had prepared for them. Although they were outnumbered, it was Caleb and Joshua’s optimistic view that earned God’s favor. He blessed them by allowing them and their descendants to live in the land.

You can subscribe to The Daily Choice which is a SPIRITUAL Devotional that helps you to make the right choices in your life by clicking here

 

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Your Words Will Direct Your Life

August 19, 2012 by 36 Comments
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Your Words Will Direct Your Life

by Olga Hermans

 

Your words will either cause blessing or curses to come into your life. They will take you up or bring you down. You can change the atmosphere of your soul with pleasant words, such as: In my pathway is life and there is no death. (Prov. 12:28.) The joy of the Lord is my strength. (Neh. 8:10.) Because You are my Shepherd, I shall not want. (Ps. 23:1.) You will never leave me or forsake me. (Heb. 13:5.)

I would say that it is a good thing to think about the power of the words we use on a daily basis. We all like to live the best life possible, isn’t it? Well, then we also need to look at the way we choose our words.

Our words have the ability to improve our attitude, strengthen our mind, heal relationships, give wisdom in the midst of chaos, communicate ideas and speak peace into a situation.

There are so plenty possibilities for the words we use. Unfortunately, there are just as many negative possibilities. Words can create confusion, anger, hatred, and tear down in just a few moments what has taken years to build.
Although you may not notice that your words do anything negative in the world around you, I challenge you to consider ways that you can do more good in the world through the power of your words. Consider these questions as you seek to do just that:

1. Do I often find myself wishing I could take back something I’ve said or written?

The blessing and curse of words is the same: They cannot be easily undone. That’s why it is critical to choose your words carefully. Whether it is the words you use to communicate with your children or handle a conflict in your work environment, once you say something, it’s said, and once you fire off that mocking email, it’s a permanent record. You can do damage or good in a matter of seconds. Make sure your words do the latter.

2. When I hear gossip, do I give in to the urge to encourage more conversation or do I change the flow of the conversation to something more positive?

I know, I know. Some gossip is awfully tempting, but make a choice to steer clear of all of it. When you embrace all that is possible for your life, you become much less concerned with negative conversation. What does it mean to gossip? Is gossip when you tell something good about what someone else does? Of course not. It is when someone tells things about another by revealing a confidence, or with the intent to “sow discord.” Proverbs 11:13 says, “A talebearer reveals secrets, But he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter.”Be on your guard about any negative words you allow into your environment – whether through people or media.

3. Do I wait until I am angry or frustrated to give people my opinion about their behavior, or do I take time to calm down before speaking about an emotionally-charged topic?

Nine times out of ten, waiting to respond to a situation that has you emotionally charged will result in a much calmer and wiser response. Wait a set period of time (it could be ten minutes, 24 hours or more) before addressing someone about an issue if you think you may say something too harshly or that you may later regret. Your communication will be clearer and more effective when you have time to take the emotion out of your response and think about the words you want to use.

4. When I am feeling down about my circumstances, do I speak negatively about myself?

The power of your words not only affects others, but perhaps most significantly, they affect you. Become aware of what you say about yourself – whether speaking to yourself or others. Do you beat yourself up for making a mistake? Do you tell yourself or others that you aren’t smart enough, experienced enough, talented enough, attractive enough or good enough to succeed in your endeavors? Even if your self-esteem leads you to believe these things are true, tell yourself the opposite. “I have everything I need to accomplish my dream. I am a good person. I am getting better day by day. My circumstances, whether positive or negative, do not define who I am.” Use your words to enhance, enrich and empower your life rather than allowing them to tear you down.

5. Do I feel the need to always voice my opinion?

Some of the wisest people in the world speak the least. They are secure enough in who they are that they don’t feel the need to prove their worthiness by expressing their opinion and knowledge at every given opportunity. Instead, they listen without judgment. Through their listening, they learn and gain wisdom. Practice being quiet, even when you feel the urge to let everyone hear your opinion. Of course, there are times when expressing your opinion is critical. Learn to discern the difference between speaking out of insecurity or a need for attention, and speaking out of authenticity and mutual benefit.

If you get control of your tongue, you can direct your entire life the way it is supposed to go. Begin speaking the truth of God’s Word, and you will see your life driven by the Word of God instead of the storms of life.

You can subscribe to The Daily Choice which brings an encouraging message 5 days a week to your inbox by clicking here 

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How To Train Your Children To Make The Right Choices

August 12, 2012 by 33 Comments
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How To Train Your Children To Make The Right Choices

by Olga Hermans

 

My children are all grown up now; I have a daughter and a son. I love them both; they are on fire for God and desire to serve Him with everything they have. They are truly a blessing to me and my husband.

But….if I would have a chance to do everything over again, I would spend less time on teaching my kids to obey me and spend more time teaching them to make wise choices. I remember the times that I thought it was the most important thing for them to obey us as parents. That is how I had grown up and so I didn’t know any better.

And of course, don’t misunderstand me. It is good for children to obey their parents, but it is better for children to hear directly from God and obey Him because they want to.

So, what are we doing when we make all the decisions for them? They won’t know how to make decisions for themselves.
There are so many areas in life where they need to know how to make a decision and how to choose for themselves. You can start with things that really don’t matter; things where they don’t sin when they make the wrong choice.

I remember when one of my children wanted to build a friendship with some body that I knew wasn’t the right choice. I knew that this friendship wasn’t going to last for more than one reason, but she wanted to hold on to that choice just to find out later that it really wasn’t what she had expected from it and it was a short friendship.

So, now she knew that some choices that seem to be right are not always right.

Then there comes a time that your children get older and you need to allow them to say no to you at times. For example: you might want to go to a particular restaurant for lunch, but your children don’t like it. It’s okay to let him or her make some of the decisions as long as it is not rebellion or manipulation.

Another important aspect of teaching our children to make right choices is allowing them to experience the consequences – good or bad – of their choices.

You and I as parents want to “rescue” our children from experiencing the negative consequences of wrong choices. When we do this, and we all do, we actually teach our children that it is okay to make a wrong choice because someone will always be there to save them and in the end, we set them up for failure.

Remember Eli in the Old Testament with his sons: Hophni and Phinehas. Eli should have taught them and warned them about the wrong things they were doing; they were dishonoring the Lord and defiling the temple and their own temple. But, Eli never confronted them and kept them employed as priests at the temple, which was not a good thing. The Bible says, “their sins will never be forgiven.”(Samuel 3:14)

This is difficult for us as parents to confront our children for certain things. I am much more confronting with our children than my husband is. I know the heartache of being in the unknown of some things in life and I have wished many times that my parents would have informed me of certain things. My father was a hard working business man, but he never talked to us about what he had to do to come that far.

He only told us that money didn’t grow on trees and that we had to work hard to make some money. So, when he died at 57 years of age, we all were in the unknown and experienced some heartache in our lives.
You see, if we rescue our children from certain consequences in life, we are not allowing the law of sowing and reaping to operate in their lives.

Here are 4 ways you can help your children make the right choices

1. Allow your children to make their own choices some of the time and as they get older; allow them to say no to you as well. When you do, it lets them feel independent and it shows your children that you trust them.

2. Let them experience the consequences of their choices; the good, the bad and the ugly so to speak. If you protect your children from the bad consequences, they will never learn from their mistakes.

3. Teach your children to follow their conscience; this should be fun! Every child loves to learn this; it makes them feel responsible for themselves. Every child has a conscience. Why do we as parents always have our kids check with us when they have to make a choice to watch a certain movie or read a certain book? We should be training them to listen to that red and green light on the inside of them.

4. Last but not least, we need to teach our children to think right thoughts, because our choices are a product of what we have been thinking about.

I think that most children don’t even realize that they have choices. We owe it to our children to teach them that they have control over what they think. That is the only way that they can have control over their own life. We as parents don’t have any control over what they are thinking, even God doesn’t have that control; we need to inform our children that what they think and speak will eventually become their destiny.

I truly believe that if we do these things we empower our children to make the right choices; they will do mighty exploits on the earth because God’s blessing will be upon their lives.

You can subscribe to The Daily Choice which brings an encouraging message 5 days a week to your inbox by clicking here 

 

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