The Seven ‘C’s’ Of A Great Marriage

August 29, 2011 by 16 Comments
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The Seven ‘C’s’ Of A Great Marriage

By Olga Hermans

Good communication involves talking, listening, understanding and taking action. Communication breakdown is the number one problem in marriage. It’s the number one cause of separation and divorce. A lot of people don’t realize it, because they relate their problems to some other area. But if your communication is proper and you have the ability to share openly, you can solve financial problems, and children problems.

If you want to live the life you were born to live; you have to be able to communicate especially with your spouse. It takes an effort on your part to communicate effectively with God and with the people who are around you. If you get your communication right with God, you can have the right communication with the people around you; communication is a process. Having a successful scriptural marriage isn’t an instant, or easy, task. But it can be done.; you just have to make a choice.

Not just by reading a book or this article, but by choosing to put the principles that God has given us to work day by day, moment by moment for the rest of your life.

Here are the seven “C’s” that probably will help you if you put them to work; you can use them over and over again

1. Communicate

Communication is listening and understanding what the other person is trying to express and you do your very best to understand the other person. Communication is also opening up and sharing yourself with another person, even if it means becoming vulnerable. Communication is the basis of any successful relationship.

2. Cover One Another

If you truly love your spouse, you won’t expose, humiliate, or condemn them whenever they make a mistake; you will cover them. 1Peter 4:8.

Wives, you won’t point your finger at your husband and tell on how often he fails to pray or how carnal he is much of the time. And husbands, you won’t point your finger at your wife and tell on how much she nags. No. You’ll cover each other’s weaknesses. Cover each other with love.

3. Cherish One Another

The word cherish there literally means, “To feel or show affection.” Ephesians 5:29 Showing affection can be done by showing gentle and caring emotion with one another. It is the number one need of a wife, but it is also very important for the men.

You know, affection will always give you that emotional thrust that you need when things get rough; you are able to act in love. It is the glue that will bond you together in good times and bad.

4. Comfort One Another

Comfort is a vitally important element that enables us to stand successfully against the devil in every area of our lives. It makes it easier for us to be patient. 2 Cor. 1:3

God wants you to be your spouse’s greatest source of comfort. There is nobody else that can bring him tenderness when they’re hurt. A word of hope when they are discouraged

You’re the one to bring them kind-heartedness when they’re hurt, words of trust when they’re downcast, and friendship when it seems the whole world has forsaken them. If you’ll do it, you will go a long way in giving your spouse the courage to move forward.

5. Compel One Another

Again, just as you’re to be the greatest source of comfort to your spouse, you’re also to be the one God primarily uses to compel them toward love and good works. You are the one who should encourage your spouse to do better in everything; to inspire each other so you won’t grow weary in doing the right things. Gal.6:9

6. Consult With One Another

Agreement is a foundational principle of relationship succes, Amos 3:3. It is impossible to walk together if there is no agreement. When you break that principle; there will be strife and your marriage might eventually fail. So check with each other to see if you can agree.

Your spouse is a gift from God; so don’t misuse it. Your spouse is your balance and the person that enables you to grow and develop in the person you have to become.

7. Cleave One to Another

Never lose sight of the need you have for each other. Gen. 2:24 Always remember that your spouse complements you in a way no one else can. No friend, no child, no parent, and no pet – as wonderful as they may be – can do more for you than your spouse.

So cleave to that one alone. Pursue the marriage relationship with a singular determination that will eventually make you one flesh – not just in concept, but in fact. That only can be done by thorough communication.

There are many jokes about how much women can talk and talk and talk, but it is based on facts I think. Yes, I as a woman have a real need of sharing conversation, not just the chatter that this joke always talks about. This is not a joke; otherwise the need of men for sex is also a joke.

There are different levels of communication; from a cliché level where you only talk about the weather. Then we can have this conversation where we only talk about the facts that we went through that day. Men have a tendency to think in terms of the headlines, while women think more in terms of fine print. We want all the details 🙂

But real communication has a total openness and transparency level; where we experience trust and are able to share completely and freely about anything and everything. This is a level where we don’t hide and cover up, no areas where you are limited or where you feel there’s a touchy subject you can’t talk about.

You need to set aside a time when you can open up and communicate with your mate on a regular basis, whether it’s over coffee in the morning, at breakfast or lunch, in the evening on the back porch or whenever. Identify some place where you can open up and share together freely.

You have to make a choice to decide, because there is much power of agreement in communication. Will you do it? Let us know in the comment section what stood out the most to you and what things do you want to change? Thank you for doing that!

This article was inspired by a book from my former pastor Billy Joe Daugherty “Building Stronger Marriages and Families”

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You Can Start Over!

August 25, 2011 by 22 Comments
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You Can Start Over!      

by Olga Hermans

 

 

 

God Originated the “Starting Over” Principle

Has there ever been a time in your life that you wanted to start all over again? Well, I would say “join the club”. Of course you have and you have many chances to do that. There are many moments in our life that we don’t know what to do and feel like we should do something and then later on regret what we did.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all human beings were born with “manufacturer’s instructions” tied to their wrists, explaining who they are and how they work? (Of course, even if we did, most of us would probably skip the instructions and try to figure out life as we went along!)

So, there are times in our life that we really miss the mark so to speak. But God has put the principle of a “new start” in the entire universe. Everybody that reads the Bible knows that He worked for six days in Genesis chapter one, and then on the seventh day He rested. The week starts all over again on Sunday.

We thank God and worship Him as we go to church on Sundays, at least most of us do. Sunday is resurrection day; it is the day that Jesus arose from the dead. The early church began to worship on the first day of the week.

Look at how we celebrate a new day every day, because the earth rotates every twenty-four hours. It doesn’t matter how dark it gets during the night, morning will always be there on time. A new moon appears faithfully every month.

Every year, we experience a new beginning because the earth rotates around the sun during the 12 months of the year and then it starts all over again.

Then there are the seasons; after summer comes fall, then winter and the spring. God said. “While the earth remains, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and winter and summer, and day and night shall not cease” Gen. 8:22.

God is the one who has put the principle of “starting over” in the earth. The time that we were farmers in Alberta and had a bad crop in a particular year, we were looking forward to the time that we could start all over and plant a new crop for the next year! I remember that time so well and that each year brought a new harvest.

The Bible is filled with stories of people beginning again. God made a beautiful, perfect Garden and put Adam and Eve in it. In spite of its perfectness, they fell. The moment they fell, God initiated a new beginning. He said, “the seed of women is going to crush your head, devil. It’s going to destroy your power and take away what you’ve done” Gen. 3:15

When Jesus came to the earth; we started all over again with a new calendar. It changed from B.C. to A.D. It was a very significant moment when Jesus arrived in the earth; time started all over again and it was not a coincidence or an accident. No! Life begins not when you were born or when you turn 50, but with the moment that you receive Jesus into your heart as your Lord and Savior.

That is the new start in our life where we can make a choice to forget all those things of the past; the things which are behind. What are you waiting for? When you want to discover the life you were born to live and really, really want to pursue your destiny you have to leave everything from the past behind you.

When you want to feel in control and have faith for the things that you can’t control, you have to arise from your slumber. You know, as soon as you know what you want your life to look like; you are able to make important decisions and all your focus and everything else gets real clear.

The life you were born to live is one without regrets, one where you can learn from your mistakes and where you feel you are in control. See what Paul told us; read it very carefully:

Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before. I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Phil. 3:13-14

Are there some things in your past that you’d like to forget? I do! We need the grace of God to forget. Grace is the power of God that enables us to do that. It is not something that we are able to do by ourselves, but it is by His gift of grace that we are able to leave the past behind and to let go of all the things that have happened.

We need to know that because Jesus shed His blood on the cross, the past is wiped out. God does not want to remind us of our past and He does not want to be reminded by us of our past. Such a good God.

People want to hold on to the past for more than one reason. They don’t realize that God originated the “Starting Over” Principle.

There are people who have had some great things happen to them in the past; they are very nostalgic, they love to experience it again and again in their mind. Then there are people who hold on to the past because it was so bad. These people are bitter and hold on through regret and sorrow, they like to go over it time after time.

Today is the day to choose to start all over again and to forget all those things of the past and lay those things “which are behind” aside. They keep you from moving forward; your future is much better than your past. There are so many things that you can look forward to.

Do you like salmon? The salmon is known as a fish with a fighting spirit. You might have seen a video of salmons where they fight the current because they want to go upstream and lay their eggs before they die.

Fighting to go upstream is not the only thing that they do; there are also bears on both sides of the stream that try to stop them from their most important accomplishment. It is amazing seeing how they challenge the rapids, rocks, and bears to reach their destiny.

Salmon have a remarkable sense of direction as some of them travel as far as 2,000 miles to find the exact stream in which they were born. Somehow, they know the exact destination they must go to lay their eggs. They must go up that particular stream to fulfill their destiny.

Their purpose – to lay eggs and fertilize them – will multiply their impact on the next generation. The bears would like to eat salmon and end their journey prematurely. The bears actually want the eggs the salmon are carrying. Many times they will rip open the fish, eat the eggs, and leave the carcass.

Do not be afraid to go upstream. God has an exact destiny or stream that you should go up to lay your eggs. Satan is not exactly just trying to stop you; he wants to get the eggs you are carrying. Satan knows that if you reach your destination and finish your course, you will lay some eggs that will bring multiplied blessing to your generation.

This might be a moment for you to make a choice to start all over again, to fight and go upstream. If that is what it takes, then just go and do it by all means. God is on your side; He watches over you all the time and you can do all things through Christ which strengthens you.
Please share with us you have been in that place where you started all over again or maybe you are in it right now. Thank you so much for doing that!

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Healthy Eating From a Biblical Perspective

August 21, 2011 by 12 Comments
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Healthy Eating From a Biblical Perspective

by Olga Hermans

Last week my family and I finished a 10 day juice fast. We watched the “Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead” Movie and realized that it would be a good thing to make a choice to detoxify our bodies. We had a great time doing it; some of us endured a lot of pain, like bad headaches. But we will probably do it again, just because we choose to make a healthy choice.

You know, all the things that we see the world promote, we can find in the Bible. Fasting is a  biblical principle; Jesus did it, John the baptist did it, Paul did it; why shouldn’t we? There is nothing new under the sun. The Bible is a very practical book; it is not a history book and not just a “pie in the sky” or something that can collect dust on your coffee table. No! You can find all the answers to all your questions. The Bible is a book that you can live by.

It covers every area of your life and it has a lot to say about what to eat and what not to eat. Yeah, God is concerned about your lifestyle. You are not the first person that has problems with food. Do you remember the first problem of Adam and Eve? Food! They ate the wrong food, the forbidden fruit.

Then there was Esau; what was his problem? He loved his lentils. There is nothing wrong with that, but he sold his birthright for a bowl of beans. Food became his downfall!

And Eli in 1Sam.1-4 was overweight because he loved that fat meat and passed his bad eating habits on to his sons. His sons loved the fat meat so much that they stole it from the sacrifices. God warned Eli to get his sons under control, but Eli liked to eat more than to obey!

Eli’s situation is sad because he really did love God. But he could not give up his eating habits or discipline his sons. He was so overweight that when he heard that the Ark of the Covenant had been stolen, he lost his balance and fell backwards off a stool, breaking his neck!

Wrong eating habits produce all kinds of bad things, but be encouraged, God has the way out of these bad habits!

1.   The Lusting For Food

We all have a desire to eat good food and that is very natural. Our bodies need food to keep going. But we never should start to lust after food. I myself love to eat chocolate with almonds in it and can really crave for chocolate. Then I read this scripture in Proverbs, that good practical book on wisdom: “Slothfulness casts into a deep sleep; and an idle soul shall suffer hunger” (Prov. 19:15).

Idle people are hungry people! Have you ever noticed that when you sit in front of the TV and you get entertained; your mind is kind of idle and you find yourself longing for all kinds of goodies? Not so when you are busy and occupied with some important things. So, it is a good thing to keep you busy. It’s good to keep your body busy, and it’s good to keep your mind busy.

Another key to eating properly is found in Proverbs 13:25: “The righteous eats to the satisfying of his soul: but the belly of the wicked shall want.”

The word that stands out here is the word “satisfying”. You can eat to the satisfying of your soul or you can go beyond that amount and stuff yourself! Most of the time we go beyond being satisfied because the food tastes so good. The righteous don’t go beyond being satisfied; they stay within that limit.

Here is a verse that might surprise you: Proverbs 25:27, “It is not good to eat much honey.” That has to do with sweets. It is better to eat natural sweets like fruit. Honey is good, but too much of any good thing is dangerous!

We’ve covered the dangers in eating sweets; now let’s look at the dangers in eating too much meat.

2.   The Eating of Food

Eating sweets is not good, and eating too much meat is not good. None of us wants to eat too much and get into trouble with our eating. We want to be healthy people. The next question would naturally be, “What can I do to change my eating habits?”

The Bible tells us how to handle our craving for too much food. The first scripture that comes to mind in changing our eating habits is 1 Corinthians 10:31: “Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.” Ask yourself if your eating habits glorify God.

We can be skinny and still not glorify God in our eating! If, on the other hand, you look like the Michelin Icon/man, will people see God in you? Proverbs 23:2 says, “And put a knife to thy throat, if thou be a man given to appetite.” That is pretty serious and it shows how serious we need to be when it comes to wrong eating habits.

Now, let’s be optimistic and look at how to eat. Proverbs 18:20 says, “A man’s belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth; and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled. Never complain about what you eat but speak good things over it.

Many people are in trouble over food because they eat when they are depressed. Proverbs has something to say about this too: “All the days of the afflicted are evil: but he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast” (Prov. 15:15).

Eat when you are happy, and it will be a feast to you. It could be crackers and milk, but you’ll be happy. Whatever you eat when you are happy will be a continual feast. You will receive more strength from your food if you eat it with joy.

4.   The Sanctifying of Food

One of the most important aspects of eating, and something that will help you to keep a right attitude in your eating, is found in 1 Timothy 4:3-5: “Forbidding to marry, and commanding to abstain from meats, which God hath created to be received with thanksgiving of them which believe and know the truth. For every creature of God is good, and nothing to be refused, if it be received with thanksgiving: for it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer.”

These verses tell us that we do not have to be vegetarians. Every creature is good for food. Remember, though, that we are not to be unruly eaters of flesh. Did you know that what you pray over, giving thanks, is set apart by the Lord for your well-being? I believe that if nutrition is lacking in what you have to eat, God can make it up to you if you will give thanks for it and pray over it.

However, that doesn’t mean you can neglect good meal planning. But sometimes you may be in a position where you can’t eat correctly. If you believe everything you hear or read about food, you will become frustrated: “Bacon causes cancer,” “Coffee causes cancer,” etc. If you followed it all, you wouldn’t know what to eat! Ask God to bless and sanctify your food, and He will take away sickness from you. You can’t always be extremely selective about what you eat, but you can pray the right thing over your food before you eat it.

5.   The Choosing of Food

We must eat the right kind of food! If you are tempted to eat a blueberry pie or a piece of cake, think of partaking resurrection power – the power you need to overcome all those bad eating habits. The more resurrection power you feed to your mind and body, the easier it will become to say, “No!” to bad eating habits.

5. The Kingdom of Food

The last point is without doubt the most important one. Paul said in Romans 14:17: “For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink: but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.” We are not to major on the “kingdom of food,” but we are to major on the Kingdom of God. Do not dwell on your eating habits, whether you are too fat or too skinny.  If you want to reach your destiny that God has for you, it might be a good choice for you to take your eyes off the problem and put your eyes on the Kingdom of God.

Here are some practical steps to change your eating habits and see your body improve:

1. Keep your mind active – think on right things (Prov. 19:15; 27:7).

2. Don’t eat to stuff yourself, but to satisfy yourself (Prov. 13:25).

3. Watch your intake of sweets and meats (Prov. 23:3,20).

4. When you eat, do it to glorify God (1 Cor. 10:31).

5. Take your bad eating habits to the cross and reckon them dead (Prov. 23:2).

6. Speak right words about your food before you eat (Prov. 18:20).

7. Don’t eat when you are depressed (Prov. 15:15).

8. Pray God’s Word over your food (1 Tim. 4:4,5; Deut. 7:13-15).

Question: Do you have any bad food habits and what are you willing to do about it?

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Seven Keys to Boost Your Confidence Instantly

August 15, 2011 by 16 Comments
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Confidence And Negativity Cannot Live In The Same House; They Are Like Oil And Water, They Do Not Mix!

 

Seven Keys to Boost Your Confidence Instantly

by Olga Hermans

 

If some people are confident while others are not there must be a reason. Let’s have a look at some keys to boost your confidence instantly and tap into some things that will help you live with more confidence and with more boldness; are you ready?

1.       Confident People are Positive

Absolutely! Confidence and negativity do not live in the same house; they are like oil and water, they do not mix! I learned this the hard way that being positive is so much better and more fun and fruitful. Being positive or negative is a choice that you have to make, it is a way of thinking, speaking, and acting. They come from a repetitious behaviour that we have formed in our life.

Our life is the way we are because we are the way we are; there is no other reason and sometimes that is hard to swallow. In life we don’t get what we want, we get in life what we are. If we want more we have to be more, to be more you have to face yourself. People don’t like to be around people that are negative.

It has been said that 90% of what we worry about never happens. Thinking negatively makes you miserable. Why be miserable when you can be happy?

2.       Confident People Say NO to Fear

Fear is not from God; it is the devil’s tool to keep people from enjoying their lives and making progress. That does not mean that we will never feel fear, but it does mean that we will not allow it to rule our decisions and choices and our actions. The Bible says that God has not given us a spirit of fear. 2Tim 1:7
Fear causes people to bury their talents because they are afraid to fail, they are afraid to be judged and be criticized.

I DO know what it means to live in fear. When my parents died I was in my late 20’s; fear hit me like a brick. Fear came over me and filled me with a sense that I would never make it on my own and until this day I still have to be very alert to resist this fear. Feelings are fickle; they are ever-changing. The bad ones are there when you wish they weren’t and the good ones disappear when you need them the most.

3.       Confident People DO NOT Compare Themselves

It is impossible to be confident when you compare yourself to others. If there is one person that you can compare yourself with, it is you. Really, that would bring the best out of you! Why compare yourself to others? No matter how good we look, how talented or smart we are, or how successful we are, there is always someone that is better, and sooner or later we run into them.

I believe confidence is found in doing the best we can with what we have to work with and not in comparing ourselves with others and competing with them. Our happiness should not be found in being better than others, but in being the best we can be. What do you think?

4.       Confident People are Action Takers

I have heard that there are two types of people in the world. The ones who wait for something to happen and the ones who make something happen. We all have something to overcome. When you want to do something, don’t let yourself think about all the things that could go wrong. Be positive and think about the exciting things that can happen. Your attitude makes all the difference in your life.

Making mistakes is not the end of the world. We can recover from mistakes. In fact, one of the few mistakes we cannot recover from is the mistake of never being willing to make one in the first place.

5.       Confident People Do Not Live in Assumptions

Many people feel empty and unfulfilled because they have spent their lives bemoaning what they did not have, instead of using what they do have. We all know those thoughts that come “what if” I had my own house, “If I only” I would have more money, “what If” I would be married and “if I only” I could have had a better start in life and so on, and on and on!

One of the biggest mistakes we can make in life is to stare at what we don’t have or have lost and fail to make an inventory of what we do have.

6.       Confident People Bounce Back Quickly

So what if you fail? So what if you made a mistake? What else is new? We all fail and we all make mistakes. The good thing is that we learn so much from our mistakes.  A person is not a failure because he/she tried some things that did not work out. We only fail when we stop trying. I have heard it many times that most people who are very successful failed their way to success.

Let all those mistakes be training ground for you, you will be much better on the other side. If you never would make any mistakes, what would you learn? Nothing, really! One of the great things about God is that He always gives you a new beginning. One thing you absolutely shouldn’t do is to let the past dictate your future. Because you learn of your mistakes you are keen to do things differently.

7.       Confident People Know That God Loves Them

If you are a Christian you should know this for sure, but even if you are not a Christian you have to know that God is a good God and He loves you no matter what you do or where you have been. He loves you more than you will ever know.

There are people who feel so bad about themselves and then get around people who hurt them. You need to look for friends that you feel safe with. God will show you how to recognize them if you listen to His wisdom. One of the ways that God loves us through people and when we have the wrong people around us, we will always have that feeling that something is wrong with us.
God’s love is unconditional and makes you feel confident.

I want to close with this scripture

Even as [in His love] He chose us [actually picked us out for Himself as His own] in Christ before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy (consecrated and set apart for Him) and blameless in His sight, even above reproach, before Him in love. For He foreordained us (destined us, planned in love for us) to be adopted (revealed) as His own children through Jesus Christ, in accordance with the purpose of His will [because it pleased Him and was His kind intent]
— Eph 1:4 -5

I hope that these 7 Keys will help you on your way to being fully confident; let me know which one jumped out the most for you.

If you would pay more attention to your thoughts and choose to think on things that will help you instead of hinder you, you will be able to boost your confidence instantly and you will enjoy being more confident. Think confident and you will be confident.

Question: Please share with us the one key that really impacted you while reading. Thank you!

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You Were Born To Be A Star

August 8, 2011 by 12 Comments
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…Then You Will Shine Among Them Like Stars In The Sky. Phil.2:14

 

You Were Born To Be A Star

by Olga Hermans

 

We live in a culture and in a time that is focused on how we should qualify as stars; being the best. Those that are inspiring for what they do or the position that they want to have in society.

I believe that not only we as people are looking for stars, but that God is also looking for stars. He is looking for you and I to shine like stars in the earth. God is not like Simon Cowell from American Idol bringing us out on the stage somewhere to be judged by the masses.

God says “I will work in you and I will work through you, that you would shine like a star. Phil.2:15

We are so focused on stars, we are searching for stars. Every realm of media and society, every sport is focused on those that are stars. We have movie stars, we have pop stars, and we have ALL stars. When your children are in school and they do well, they get a gold star. A star is something that we are looking for. Before you go to a restaurant or hotel, you check how many stars it has; is it a 2 star or a 3 star or prestigious 5 star. We are focused on stardom; we are focused on the best. Not only in people, but in things as well.

An Oreo cookie is considered as the best in its field; they sold 400 billion cookies since they were first created and they go down as the most popular cookie of the twentieth century. Now you know that Oreo’s are stars.

We live in a culture and in a mindset that is focused on stars; we are searching for stars. Many of us would say about ourselves “well, I am not a star”, but looking at others who are an athlete, a musician or some political figure and we say, well they were probably just born that way.

I was reading an article the other day by Steven Levitt; he was asking  about the commonalities between those who would succeed and there were certainly a number character traits and personality traits. But there was one thing he found in an ordinate number of those that had succeeded and advanced to the premiership in their nation. These people were born in the first three months of the year. There was an above average of people that were born in that span of time and so they dug a little bit deeper and then they found that 40% of all those that had become stars were born in those months. And only 15% of those who were born in the last 3 months of the year became stars.

The finding was simply that the kids who started school at a slightly older age were just slightly more developed; they had a little bit more opportunity to give their best and were noticed and affirmed and given tasks appropriate to that. And so at a young age they were given the opportunity to work at it.

You know, I don’t believe that stars were just born. It takes a little bit of work. And if you talk to someone who is classified as a star they are quick to say “I have worked hard at what I got.”

You have to live in the fullness of your purpose and passion for your life. It is like you are sitting in your car and your eyes are dozing off; you’re getting a little sleepy behind the wheel and you feel the shatter on the side of the road. And then there is that moment of alertness where you come to your senses and you become far more aware of what could have just happened and adrenaline fires through your body.

The apostle Paul tells us that there should be a shot of adrenaline in our spirit at the thought of living anything less than what you were saved for.

It is like you are on the road of life right now and you are falling asleep behind the wheel of your life. I want to encourage you today to wake up, let there be a search of adrenaline that God has something bigger and grander in store for you. You could totally miss it; you could totally miss what God has in store for you.

Php 2:13  For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him. It is God who is working in you to will and to act.

It is like a light bulb; this is an extended service light bulb.

This lightbulb was designed to shine brightly; it was fashioned that way. It is perfectly designed that way, but unless it is connected to a source of power it can accomplish nothing.

In fact, it doesn’t matter what this lightbulb thinks of itself, this lightbuld might have some insecurities that it cannot keep up with the more eco-friendly light bulbs. This light bulb might be a little bit ashamed of its 40 watts thinking that there are some 60 watts out there and some 90’’. This light bulb might be embarrassed that it is not halogen.

But it does not matter what the light bulb thinks of itself, when it is connected to the power it will shine as it was designed to do. In the same manner this light bulb might think “check out my form”. I got something special to offer and this lightbulb might go trying to light the world but unless it is connect to its source of power, it will accomplish nothing.

Let me encourage you today that it is both humbling and empowering in every way. It is God who works in us to will and to act. How does He work in us? He gives us purpose. He gives us the power to accomplish that purpose. God is willing and able to make you and I able. It is God who gives us purpose.

For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. Philippians 2:13 If we allow God to work in us and through us, we shine because that is what He has designed us to do. It is how He created us.

He has a great design in store for your life, He causes you to shine like a star. You don’t have to do it on your own, but you have to do it. There is something to do for you here on the earth. There should be a shot of adrenaline to think of living anything less than all that God has for you.

Once you discover what God has in store for you; you also will  discover your passion, pursue it with every fiber in your body until you achieve every goal you have with that passion. What is YOUR passion that you are currently pursuing? Let us know by leaving a comment.

You can subscribe to The Daily Choice which brings an encouraging message 5 days a week to your inbox by clicking here

 

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Digital Travel Writer: Portable Lifestyle Made Easy by Wifi and Travel Apps

August 1, 2011 by 7 Comments
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Today you are in for a different treat again, because my good friend Claudia Looi is visiting us on The Choice Driven Life with a great subject:  our WiFi lifestyle – on the go with the necessary travel apps!

I know you will like it as much as I like her writings.  I met Claudia 6-7 weeks ago in Chicago at a conference with our coach Sandi Krakowski. She writes a great blog called The Travelpro and I visit it often to read her excellent and handy tips.

So, enjoy today’s article and let us know how much you enjoyed it.

 

 

Digital Travel Writer: Portable Lifestyle Made Easy by Wifi and Travel Apps

by Claudia Looi

 

One of the top treats of being a freelance writer is the ability to work in anywhere at anytime as long as you meet the deadline and produce the results needed. Last week I had the joy of just sitting in our local Barnes and Noble by their Starbucks Café…reading and drinking a less than $3 Grande Americano (I don’t drink sugared coffee). I got free Wi-Fi, a great cup of coffee, company of my son and people watching…that is part of my business model…people watch…I study human behavior as a copywriter.

While sipping coffee, researching and writing about geography and travels in Tanzania for my client in the UK…something clicked…I am a Digital Nomad. None of my clients live near me. They are all at least 1,000 miles away…. Wikipedia has the best description… A digital nomad is someone who uses technology and the internet to work remotely—from home, the coffee shop, internet cafe, or even to collaborate remotely with teams anywhere in the world.

These entrepreneurs & professionals frequently use new technologies like a smartphone, wifi, and web-based applications to develop location independence and earn an income wherever they live or travel. To me the most important aspect for any traveler or business person in this generation, even if you don’t work remotely, is the availability of wifi.

What if there were no wifi? What would you do? Clear 4G Take-it-with-you is a super fast internet connections you can bring with you wherever you go in about 80 cities in the United States. If you are an entrepreneur, traveler or an employee that travels for work in the United States, Clear could be a cheaper option compared to the fee that most hotel charge for room internet connections.

The last time I check in a hotel in Chicago, it was $9.99 per night. For unlimited internet access outside of the United States XComGlobal.com may be an alternative. They cover over 40 countries and you can select the mobile hotspot option or USB Modem option. It is cheaper to get a mobile hotspot in the country you are visiting.

Here is an example of one we used last year while traveling in Malaysia. DiGi has all the options for entrepreneurs and travelers to stay in touch. Other than wifi, travel apps do come in handy for a digital travel writer. What are these travel apps for? They are apps on smartphones or laptops that help assist with trip planning, free phone calls or cheaper phone calls, worldwide radios, track flights, hotel and restaurant reservation, language translation… to every type of games imaginable.

Here are 5 that I like:

1.   Skype is a free app and you can call for free from one Skype account to another. Or make cheaper phone calls from anywhere with your contacts who are not on Skype. You can also send instant messages.

2.   Tripit helps you organize your travel. You create your trip by entering the start and end dates, transportation details (flights, car rental etc), accommodation, restaurants and activities. After entering all the details you get your itinerary at your finger tips. What seems to be a tedious way of typing out and putting in order is now automated for you.

3.   Flight track help you track your flights on real time, including delays and gate numbers. It even comes with a map and the airplane you are tracking. They track worldwide flights and will give you updates on cancellations and find alternative flights. This app cost $4.99 from iTunes. Or track for free on your laptop or desktop.

4.   Oanda Currency Converter can convert over 190 currencies and 4 metals. Imagine… your silver coin can be converted too! This app is free. Get an idea of how much cash you need to have in hand when you travel. Shows you a typical rate charge for the currency you are exchanging.

5.   Google translate is able to translate up to 50 languages. You can even listen to your own spoken translations. This is just an entertainment while you wait for a flight or just filling in time. This is a free app.

If you find this information helpful, don’t forget to grab our free report on 5 Keys to planning a vacation of your dreams…do it today. This report may help you not to put off the trip of your dreams. If it is not now…when will your dream vacation be?

Claudia Looi is a freelance travel, content and copywriter. She is a mother of two teens and currently lives in Florida. A former travel professional with various tour operators, she has lived and worked in Kuala Lumpur, Auckland and New York. She currently writes for travel, hotels, real estate and wellness industries. Most of her writings are not in her name. They are featured in the United States, Malaysia, New Zealand and Belize. She has traveled to over 20 nations and some multiple times. You can find her at www.travelwritingpro.com. While you are there grab her Free Report 5 Keys to planning a vacation of your dreams.

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Know What Stands Between You and Your Destiny

July 28, 2011 by 12 Comments
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Know What Stands Between You and Your Destiny

by Olga Hermans

 

Are you in for a little challenge today? We’ve all had our share of adversities and we will continue to face hard times but harsh conditions have a way of bringing out the champion on the inside of us. Let’s have a look at our life experiences not in a self-pity manner or in a manner that brings disappointment or shame but from the standpoint of turning all our past experiences into hope for someone else.

If you would do that it would bring out your own uniqueness, your own message and you would move towards your destiny with great expectancy.

You might be going through something that somebody else is going through right now and they need your wisdom for that certain situation. They need to know what you know. Here is a very suitable quote form Myles Monroe: “Most people think the greatest tragedy in life is death. The greatest tragedy in life is to live and not know your purpose”.

Having lived your whole life and never really having that assurance of know what you have accomplished what you were meant to do is a very discouraging thought. So, if you are saying that you don’t have any dreams or you don’t have any goals, you definitely need to spend more time with God. Because God has a destiny for everybody on this planet and that includes you!

Sandi Krakowski

Some of us are called to be entrepreneurs and to be successful, like my coach, Sandi Krakowski. She went through a lot of trauma as a young girl; even gang raped in her 20s. She is a true survivor turned thriver – $500K debt – given a year to live – to creating and owning one of the fastest growing online business-coaching and information publishing companies in North America. Today she is totally debt free for the past 5 years and medically completely healthy and she gives God all the credit for it.

Others are called to be a mother of 12. Yeah, my friend Charlotte Siems is a pastor’s wife and she has 12 children.

Or my friend Denny Hagel who has a passion to help parents raise their children and is doing this already for over 25 years and is very succesfull.

It doesn’t matter what you do as a career or calling, God wants to use you and impact people around you. He wants you as you are, as He designed you to be; nothing less and nothing more. Here is another great quote from Mike Murdoch: “Your life’s assignment is not your decision but your discovery”.

Of course there are some decisions that you have to make to make it all happen. I remember the moment that my husband and I decided to go to VBI-Tulsa; that was a major decision for us and one of the best decisions we have ever made. But it wasn’t easy; our children were 13 and 11. We moved from overseas; they had to learn English, leave their friends behind and make new friends. But our lives have never been the same since.

Decisions are like falling dominoes in a line, each one toppling one irreversible consequence against another. After that we went back to The Netherlands to start a bibleschool, which also was a big decision that we did not regret. Life is too short for regrets. That’s why it is soo important for you to know who you are, what is important to you and what you want to do with your life.

God orders our steps; that means that He is always endeavouring to maneuver you towards your destiny. If you will listen to Him, then you will always be in the right place at the right time with the right people. That’s the reason you need to be sensitive to His leadership.

I believe that God has some extremely exciting things on the horizon for you. No matter how miserable your life may be at this very moment, God has a plan and God’s plan is to turn your life around. Make a choice to not run from Him, when you are distressed and unhappy, then He will and He can turn your situation around. He always knows what to do; He knows exactly what it takes to turn your life around.

What stands between you and your destiny? God’s will for you is always triumph! ALWAYS! 2Cor.2:14. That means that God always wants the very best for your life, no matter how impossible your circumstances look at this very moment. If you stumble and fall seven times, get up again ad go again. Remember, your hard times make you strong!

Satan will come between you and your destiny. He’ll create barriers. He’ll create obstacles, tests and trials because he knows more than you do that God has a powerful plan for your life. He will stand between you and your destiny. He will come up with the most ridiculous situations so that you will be discouraged and want to quit, and never fulfill what God has planned for you.

Let me remind that the difficulties that you are facing today, the thing that is trying to keep you from your destiny today, could become that stepping stone to your greatest victory! Don’t let the devil steal your destiny. God is always there to help you; He will change your whole life. Just as He did with my coach Sandi Krakowski; she is a great example to many.

Never get the idea that your life is no good because you weren’t on drugs or because you hadn’t made a terrible mess of your life. I know people think they don’t have a good testimony because they didn’t experience a whole lot of things. I think that, that is a wonderful testimony and there are people who want to hear it. People are looking for evidence; they are looking for what you have on the inside of you.

If this article is talking to you, it may be time to reexamine what you are doing. You are not meant to live an unfulfilled life. Make sure that you are doing THAT particular thing that is part of your destiny. Don’t spend years and years in a meaningless existence, doing something you dislike, staying there simply because it is convenient and you don’t want to rock the boat. Let me help you to step into your divine destiny; I wrote this book especially for you.

There are many people who have no clue what they are supposed to do in life, don’t let this  be you!
Go and get my book NOW by clicking here!

 

What Did You Think?

Please take a quick moment and leave your comments below.  Thank you!

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Simple Steps to Pay Yourself First

July 25, 2011 by 13 Comments
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Many of our readers that completed our survey told us that they would love to read more on money issues. I am pleased to tell you that my friend Beau Henderson with whom I did The RichLife Fast Track 30 Day Coaching Program, as some of you will remember, was more than willing to be  our guest today at The Choice Driven Life.

I have learned a lot of things from him lately all around making the right choices for our financial life as well. One choice that we should make and that would give our fnances a boost, you will learn from him today.

I am so glad to introduce Beau to you our valuable readers. I am very blessed to know Beau and even more honored when he said yes when I asked him to be our guest on the blog today.

You will learn a principle that is definitely going to change your life, if you apply it.

Enjoy today’s article by Beau Henderson!!

 

 

You are the most important asset that you have. Take care of yourself.

 

Simple Steps to Pay Yourself First

by Beau Henderson

 

Are you saving regularly?

Many people never save because they think it is too complicated, but the concept of saving is really quite simple.  Developing the discipline of saving is what takes a little work.

The three reasons I hear most for not being able to save are: I don’t make enough, I’ll save what’s left, and I have too much debt.
Do you relate to any of these reasons for not saving?

Let’s examine these excuses together, one at a time, and find out how you can start to pay yourself first.  The good news is that You can begin to save now, today, because paying yourself first is a mindset and a habit that has nothing to do with the size of your paycheck.

Reason #1: I don’t make enough money…

There are two kinds of people – those who save now and those who wait. The employee who makes $2,000 a month and gets in the habit of putting $50 of it away will have $600 saved by the end of the year. The same employee who waits until they can “save more” will have $0. And after 10 years, they still won’t have anything saved, and will still be waiting to have enough to save.
Are You Playing the “When I/Then I” Game?

It goes something like this… “When I can save $200 a month, then I will start to put away money for the future”.  The problem with this game is that it rarely, if ever works and our nature is to always create the next “When I/Then I” scenario instead of developing the habit needed to be successful with money.
Get into the habit of setting aside a portion of what you make now.

It doesn’t matter how little, it can be $5 or $5000. The important thing is to get in the habit. If you can bump up that amount annually by at least 3% or $25 a check as your pay increases, and in ten years, you’ll be saving at least $250 a paycheck. But it will never add up like that unless you get started.

Reason #2 I’ll save what’s left…

And typically what’s left is nothing. It happens to everyone. Saving won’t happen if you approach it this way. It is human nature to spend what is there, so don’t even give yourself the option. Take out the amount first, before you’ve even see it. Have it automatically deducted if you can, and put it into a separate account. Once you get in the habit of doing this, you won’t even miss it.
Put it on Auto Pilot For Success

To be successful at paying yourself first make savings automatic.  Your company’s 401k, 403b, SEP, or other retirement plan can deduct a percentage of your income pre-tax from your paycheck.  You can set up an automatic draft to fund after tax savings like ROTH IRAs, brokerage accounts, and savings accounts.  You have to plan for real life  and can set up automatic drafts to fill up separate buckets for emergency savings, car fund, house maintenance.
Reward Yourself to Stay on Track

All of this automatic saving is great, but if you want to stay on track you have to build in some rewards for all of your disciplined hard work.  Most successful clients build in buckets or automatic accounts to fill up for things like a road trip to see the grandkids, an annual trip to Vegas, or a deep sea fishing trip with the guys.

Remember, financial success is about living well.  These memorable experiences are priceless and need to be planned and saved for or else we are right back to playing the “When I/Then I” game in this area as well.

Reason #3 I have too much debt…

The truth is those that have the discipline to pay themselves first get out of debt faster.

Debt won’t go away unless you pay it off and nothing will get saved unless you start now. So split the difference. Come up with a formula that works for you.   People that have a succesful relationship with money create a formula using these 4 components:

Example:

1.      An amount you can live off – 70%

2.      An amount to save – 10%

3.      An amount to go towards debt – 10%

4.      An amount to give away – 10%

If you need every penny, the breakdown can be 97%, 1%, 1%, 1%.

What happens when the debt is gone?  You’ll be able to increase your savings without having to change your lifestyle or spend a penny more.

Paying yourself first puts the focus where it should be – on the person whom the money was meant to serve. In my experience, it is never the behavior of the investment that makes the difference so much as the behavior of the investor.

You are the most important asset that you have. Take care of yourself. It might be hard at first, but getting into the habit now will result in easier saving tomorrow. This is one of the core principals necessary to building a RichLife. It is my most sincere hope that you achieve yours.

What is your biggest obstacle when it comes to paying yourself first?

 

Beau Henderson is a financial advisor, author, coach, radio personality, and CEO of RichLife Advisors. He has helped over 3,000 clients to not just improve their relationship with money, but to live the life of their dreams.  For more tips on how you can apply the principal of wise stewardship to your everyday life, get a copy of Beau’s newest book, The RichLife – 10 Investments for True Wealth.

 

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How to Have a Thought-Life You Can Be Proud Of

July 21, 2011 by 9 Comments
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Our Mind Can Be Like Those Old Typewriters


How to Have a Thought-life You Can Be Proud Of

by Olga Hermans

 

In Deut 30:19, God says, “I have set before you life and death, blessing and curses; therefore choose life.” He gives us an option, but He wants us to do the choosing.  A choice often means we can go the easy way or the hard way.  We can go the way we feel like going or we can go the way we know is right. To make a right and wise choice means we will probably have to discipline ourselves to do something we don’t feel like doing, but know is best.

As the Bible tells us, discipline doesn’t bring immediate joy, but it does bring lasting joy later on. The enemy is always out to destroy us and he often tries to do that by influencing us to make bad choices – to choose to do what feels good or is easy now, instead of what will be beneficial in the long run.

These choices may temporarily satisfy the flesh, but they don’t please God or satisfy us permanently. We should discipline ourselves to make good choices that honor God and His Word. God encourages His children to walk in the Spirit and the way we do that is by choosing to take time to listen to the Holy Spirit and do what we know is right even if it doesn’t feel good.

We’ve all known or know a time when we were in a disagreement with somebody and the air was filled with tension. You can choose to apologize and do what will restore peace or you can choose to stay angry and wait for the other to apologize; we have all been there.

So, what is more important? To be right or to choose for peace? The answer is that it is the right thing to make peace and if we don’t, we are sinning. God is our vindicator and if we need to be shown to be in the right, He will take care of that, but our part is to honor Him by doing what we know is right according to His Word. God can always work out the details but we need to make that quality choice to keep the peace.

You have to realize now more than anything that making right choices is the key to a happy life, and keeping our minds on right things is another one. Don’t let your mind wander around and do whatever it pleases. We have been given the spirit of discipline and self-control. You have been given a sound mind.

I love to sit beside my husband when we are riding down the road; I like to look out of the passenger side window while my husband is driving. He would give a smile if he would be reading this :), but my mind can go off on a drift or wander off onto something that is totally worthless and will not produce anything good in my life.

That doesn’t make me a bad person; it just means I have a choice to make. Will I be lazy and let it “drift”, or will I once again discipline myself to stop thinking that wrong thought and find something good and noble to think about?

I once heard an analogy that someone made; she said our mind can be like those old typewriters. We are focussing on something and our mind starts to wander away from us just like that handle on the typerwriter. I know this typewriter probably tells you my age more than anything else, but, when you start typing, that handle would go all the way to the right and you had to push it back to start e new line.

That is how our mind works, we are in a conversation or something, or reading a book or whatever we do and our mind wanders off…outside the window and we have to push it back just like that old typewriter. Do you get the picture?

My mind can drift when I am in a conversation with my husband, but it also happens when others are speaking and what they are saying really isn’t that interesting to me. It seems to be important to them, but it isn’t to me. My mind starts to drift to thoughts like: “I really have some more important things to do. Or, this is boring… or this goes way too far, I cannot believe this.” Things like that? Oh, you ever thought those things?

Then suddenly a message from my pastor or somebody comes up that we have to treat other people the way we like to be treated. Ouch!! We need to make the other person feel valuable, because they are. So, I am faced with a choice: do I walk in love and show respect for the person talking to me, or do I just pretend that I am listening while I have these wandering thoughts?

Are you surprised that these thoughts happen to me? Let me tell you a secret: they happen to everyone. We are not bad people because bad thoughts come to us but if we don’t resist them, we can become whatever we choose to focus our thoughts on.

The Bible tells us to seek good (1Thess 5:15). Seek means to make an attempt. We all have to seek to think right thoughts. It takes discipline and training, but we can do it. Determine today to set your mind on right things and discipline yourself to keep it set on them and you will enjoy the great and powerful life God has in mind for you.

When you find yourself stuck in a”wandering away” thought that is detrimental to you and you have a hard time staying focussed; get busy doing something good to bless someone. One thing you should not do is stay passive and merely wish you could get it off your mind. Be aggressive and refuse to lend your mind to the devil for his activity.

Remember that bad thoughts lead to bad moods and bad decisions, so don’t waste your time on anything that doesn’t add to the quality of your life. Think on that typewriter, I have to do that many times. 😉

You know, if we are deciding on what we think on or decide where our thoughts go; it all comes down to making decisions. We have to make a choice to activate our will to stay focused. Learn How to Make Decisions Like an Expert in 7 Easy Steps by reading our FREE Report.
Click here to receive it.

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How to Manage Your Happiness by Keeping Yourself Sane

July 18, 2011 by 9 Comments
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God Does Not Want You To Sacrifice Your Happiness To Keep Somebody Else Happy

 

How to Manage Your Happiness by Keeping Yourself

By Olga Hermans

 

Oh, how important it is to keep yourself happy and not be living to please everybody else. How easy we can get in that habit of taking on a false sense of responsibility, thinking that it is our job to keep everybody happy. Of course, it is always good to reach out to others and to try to help as many people as possible.

Do you sense the “but” coming? Too often, though, we get out of balance. We’re doing everything for everybody else, but we’re not taking the time to keep ourselves healthy and happy. God does not want you to sacrifice your happiness to keep somebody else happy.

Your first priority is to take care of yourself. I don’t mean to the extent of being selfish and only me, me, me. That is not what I am saying, but I am saying that you cannot be responsible for someone else’s poor choices. If you do, before long, that person will be controlling you and manipulating you.

I think we all know how that feels. God has not called you to be unhappy simply to keep somebody else happy. Truth is, some people don’t want to be helped; they don’t want to change. They just like the attention. Sometimes, the best thing you can do for somebody like that is not to help them.

I remember the time with my oldest sister, who lives in The Netherlands and is mentally ill. I don’t know how she did it, but she could make me feel so guilty if I wouldn’t do that particular thing that pleased her. A few years ago there was a time that I called her every day at the same time and spoke scriptures into her mind. She so enjoyed it and it looked like she was doing so much better.

Anyway, my husband and I were going to a conference in Dallas. She told me how afraid she was to not have me call her and this and that. So, ok I told her I would call every day. I think the 2nd or 3rd time I called her at our agreed time to hear from the front desk that she had gone to a movie. That was the moment that I started to realize I had to do things differently although she was mentally ill.

Life is too short to go through it being controlled and manipulated by people who refuse to make good choices on their own. You are not responsible for everybody else’s happiness. If people are controlling you, it’s not their fault; it’s your fault. You must learn to set some boundaries. Quit allowing them to call you at all hours of the day and night to dump their problems on you.

Many people are all upset, frustrated and discouraged because they’ve made a wrong choice of taking on way too much responsibility for somebody close to them who won’t do what is right. They carry a heavy load, trying to keep someone else happy.

You can be free from all that if you will just give those people to God. Quit trying to be the keeper of the universe. That is not your job. Of course, is not easy at first. My decision towards my sister was very hard on me, but I had to do it. I am not talking about selfish or self-centeredness. We should be givers and care for each other. But there is a big difference between giving and allowing somebody to control you and make you feel guilty until you do what they want.

To reduce stress, be aware of high-maintenance people in your life. Some people are almost impossible to keep happy. Maybe this is a turning point for you. If you have been living to please everybody else, or constantly trying to fix everything, rid yourself of that false sense of responsibility. Yes, be kind and compassionate and yes you should reach out to others. It’s like the saying that says: “you can’t help anybody who won’t help themselves”.

You gotta run your race and not let people control you and manipulate you; you will not only have less stress and more time and energy, but I also believe you will be much happier, and you will be free to fulfill the best plan that God has for you.

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