Seven Keys to Boost Your Confidence Instantly

August 15, 2011 by 16 Comments
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Confidence And Negativity Cannot Live In The Same House; They Are Like Oil And Water, They Do Not Mix!

 

Seven Keys to Boost Your Confidence Instantly

by Olga Hermans

 

If some people are confident while others are not there must be a reason. Let’s have a look at some keys to boost your confidence instantly and tap into some things that will help you live with more confidence and with more boldness; are you ready?

1.       Confident People are Positive

Absolutely! Confidence and negativity do not live in the same house; they are like oil and water, they do not mix! I learned this the hard way that being positive is so much better and more fun and fruitful. Being positive or negative is a choice that you have to make, it is a way of thinking, speaking, and acting. They come from a repetitious behaviour that we have formed in our life.

Our life is the way we are because we are the way we are; there is no other reason and sometimes that is hard to swallow. In life we don’t get what we want, we get in life what we are. If we want more we have to be more, to be more you have to face yourself. People don’t like to be around people that are negative.

It has been said that 90% of what we worry about never happens. Thinking negatively makes you miserable. Why be miserable when you can be happy?

2.       Confident People Say NO to Fear

Fear is not from God; it is the devil’s tool to keep people from enjoying their lives and making progress. That does not mean that we will never feel fear, but it does mean that we will not allow it to rule our decisions and choices and our actions. The Bible says that God has not given us a spirit of fear. 2Tim 1:7
Fear causes people to bury their talents because they are afraid to fail, they are afraid to be judged and be criticized.

I DO know what it means to live in fear. When my parents died I was in my late 20’s; fear hit me like a brick. Fear came over me and filled me with a sense that I would never make it on my own and until this day I still have to be very alert to resist this fear. Feelings are fickle; they are ever-changing. The bad ones are there when you wish they weren’t and the good ones disappear when you need them the most.

3.       Confident People DO NOT Compare Themselves

It is impossible to be confident when you compare yourself to others. If there is one person that you can compare yourself with, it is you. Really, that would bring the best out of you! Why compare yourself to others? No matter how good we look, how talented or smart we are, or how successful we are, there is always someone that is better, and sooner or later we run into them.

I believe confidence is found in doing the best we can with what we have to work with and not in comparing ourselves with others and competing with them. Our happiness should not be found in being better than others, but in being the best we can be. What do you think?

4.       Confident People are Action Takers

I have heard that there are two types of people in the world. The ones who wait for something to happen and the ones who make something happen. We all have something to overcome. When you want to do something, don’t let yourself think about all the things that could go wrong. Be positive and think about the exciting things that can happen. Your attitude makes all the difference in your life.

Making mistakes is not the end of the world. We can recover from mistakes. In fact, one of the few mistakes we cannot recover from is the mistake of never being willing to make one in the first place.

5.       Confident People Do Not Live in Assumptions

Many people feel empty and unfulfilled because they have spent their lives bemoaning what they did not have, instead of using what they do have. We all know those thoughts that come “what if” I had my own house, “If I only” I would have more money, “what If” I would be married and “if I only” I could have had a better start in life and so on, and on and on!

One of the biggest mistakes we can make in life is to stare at what we don’t have or have lost and fail to make an inventory of what we do have.

6.       Confident People Bounce Back Quickly

So what if you fail? So what if you made a mistake? What else is new? We all fail and we all make mistakes. The good thing is that we learn so much from our mistakes.  A person is not a failure because he/she tried some things that did not work out. We only fail when we stop trying. I have heard it many times that most people who are very successful failed their way to success.

Let all those mistakes be training ground for you, you will be much better on the other side. If you never would make any mistakes, what would you learn? Nothing, really! One of the great things about God is that He always gives you a new beginning. One thing you absolutely shouldn’t do is to let the past dictate your future. Because you learn of your mistakes you are keen to do things differently.

7.       Confident People Know That God Loves Them

If you are a Christian you should know this for sure, but even if you are not a Christian you have to know that God is a good God and He loves you no matter what you do or where you have been. He loves you more than you will ever know.

There are people who feel so bad about themselves and then get around people who hurt them. You need to look for friends that you feel safe with. God will show you how to recognize them if you listen to His wisdom. One of the ways that God loves us through people and when we have the wrong people around us, we will always have that feeling that something is wrong with us.
God’s love is unconditional and makes you feel confident.

I want to close with this scripture

Even as [in His love] He chose us [actually picked us out for Himself as His own] in Christ before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy (consecrated and set apart for Him) and blameless in His sight, even above reproach, before Him in love. For He foreordained us (destined us, planned in love for us) to be adopted (revealed) as His own children through Jesus Christ, in accordance with the purpose of His will [because it pleased Him and was His kind intent]
— Eph 1:4 -5

I hope that these 7 Keys will help you on your way to being fully confident; let me know which one jumped out the most for you.

If you would pay more attention to your thoughts and choose to think on things that will help you instead of hinder you, you will be able to boost your confidence instantly and you will enjoy being more confident. Think confident and you will be confident.

Question: Please share with us the one key that really impacted you while reading. Thank you!

You can subscribe to The Daily Choice which brings an encouraging message 5 days a week to your inbox by clicking here

 

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Digital Travel Writer: Portable Lifestyle Made Easy by Wifi and Travel Apps

August 1, 2011 by 7 Comments
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Today you are in for a different treat again, because my good friend Claudia Looi is visiting us on The Choice Driven Life with a great subject:  our WiFi lifestyle – on the go with the necessary travel apps!

I know you will like it as much as I like her writings.  I met Claudia 6-7 weeks ago in Chicago at a conference with our coach Sandi Krakowski. She writes a great blog called The Travelpro and I visit it often to read her excellent and handy tips.

So, enjoy today’s article and let us know how much you enjoyed it.

 

 

Digital Travel Writer: Portable Lifestyle Made Easy by Wifi and Travel Apps

by Claudia Looi

 

One of the top treats of being a freelance writer is the ability to work in anywhere at anytime as long as you meet the deadline and produce the results needed. Last week I had the joy of just sitting in our local Barnes and Noble by their Starbucks Café…reading and drinking a less than $3 Grande Americano (I don’t drink sugared coffee). I got free Wi-Fi, a great cup of coffee, company of my son and people watching…that is part of my business model…people watch…I study human behavior as a copywriter.

While sipping coffee, researching and writing about geography and travels in Tanzania for my client in the UK…something clicked…I am a Digital Nomad. None of my clients live near me. They are all at least 1,000 miles away…. Wikipedia has the best description… A digital nomad is someone who uses technology and the internet to work remotely—from home, the coffee shop, internet cafe, or even to collaborate remotely with teams anywhere in the world.

These entrepreneurs & professionals frequently use new technologies like a smartphone, wifi, and web-based applications to develop location independence and earn an income wherever they live or travel. To me the most important aspect for any traveler or business person in this generation, even if you don’t work remotely, is the availability of wifi.

What if there were no wifi? What would you do? Clear 4G Take-it-with-you is a super fast internet connections you can bring with you wherever you go in about 80 cities in the United States. If you are an entrepreneur, traveler or an employee that travels for work in the United States, Clear could be a cheaper option compared to the fee that most hotel charge for room internet connections.

The last time I check in a hotel in Chicago, it was $9.99 per night. For unlimited internet access outside of the United States XComGlobal.com may be an alternative. They cover over 40 countries and you can select the mobile hotspot option or USB Modem option. It is cheaper to get a mobile hotspot in the country you are visiting.

Here is an example of one we used last year while traveling in Malaysia. DiGi has all the options for entrepreneurs and travelers to stay in touch. Other than wifi, travel apps do come in handy for a digital travel writer. What are these travel apps for? They are apps on smartphones or laptops that help assist with trip planning, free phone calls or cheaper phone calls, worldwide radios, track flights, hotel and restaurant reservation, language translation… to every type of games imaginable.

Here are 5 that I like:

1.   Skype is a free app and you can call for free from one Skype account to another. Or make cheaper phone calls from anywhere with your contacts who are not on Skype. You can also send instant messages.

2.   Tripit helps you organize your travel. You create your trip by entering the start and end dates, transportation details (flights, car rental etc), accommodation, restaurants and activities. After entering all the details you get your itinerary at your finger tips. What seems to be a tedious way of typing out and putting in order is now automated for you.

3.   Flight track help you track your flights on real time, including delays and gate numbers. It even comes with a map and the airplane you are tracking. They track worldwide flights and will give you updates on cancellations and find alternative flights. This app cost $4.99 from iTunes. Or track for free on your laptop or desktop.

4.   Oanda Currency Converter can convert over 190 currencies and 4 metals. Imagine… your silver coin can be converted too! This app is free. Get an idea of how much cash you need to have in hand when you travel. Shows you a typical rate charge for the currency you are exchanging.

5.   Google translate is able to translate up to 50 languages. You can even listen to your own spoken translations. This is just an entertainment while you wait for a flight or just filling in time. This is a free app.

If you find this information helpful, don’t forget to grab our free report on 5 Keys to planning a vacation of your dreams…do it today. This report may help you not to put off the trip of your dreams. If it is not now…when will your dream vacation be?

Claudia Looi is a freelance travel, content and copywriter. She is a mother of two teens and currently lives in Florida. A former travel professional with various tour operators, she has lived and worked in Kuala Lumpur, Auckland and New York. She currently writes for travel, hotels, real estate and wellness industries. Most of her writings are not in her name. They are featured in the United States, Malaysia, New Zealand and Belize. She has traveled to over 20 nations and some multiple times. You can find her at www.travelwritingpro.com. While you are there grab her Free Report 5 Keys to planning a vacation of your dreams.

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Know What Stands Between You and Your Destiny

July 28, 2011 by 12 Comments
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Know What Stands Between You and Your Destiny

by Olga Hermans

 

Are you in for a little challenge today? We’ve all had our share of adversities and we will continue to face hard times but harsh conditions have a way of bringing out the champion on the inside of us. Let’s have a look at our life experiences not in a self-pity manner or in a manner that brings disappointment or shame but from the standpoint of turning all our past experiences into hope for someone else.

If you would do that it would bring out your own uniqueness, your own message and you would move towards your destiny with great expectancy.

You might be going through something that somebody else is going through right now and they need your wisdom for that certain situation. They need to know what you know. Here is a very suitable quote form Myles Monroe: “Most people think the greatest tragedy in life is death. The greatest tragedy in life is to live and not know your purpose”.

Having lived your whole life and never really having that assurance of know what you have accomplished what you were meant to do is a very discouraging thought. So, if you are saying that you don’t have any dreams or you don’t have any goals, you definitely need to spend more time with God. Because God has a destiny for everybody on this planet and that includes you!

Sandi Krakowski

Some of us are called to be entrepreneurs and to be successful, like my coach, Sandi Krakowski. She went through a lot of trauma as a young girl; even gang raped in her 20s. She is a true survivor turned thriver – $500K debt – given a year to live – to creating and owning one of the fastest growing online business-coaching and information publishing companies in North America. Today she is totally debt free for the past 5 years and medically completely healthy and she gives God all the credit for it.

Others are called to be a mother of 12. Yeah, my friend Charlotte Siems is a pastor’s wife and she has 12 children.

Or my friend Denny Hagel who has a passion to help parents raise their children and is doing this already for over 25 years and is very succesfull.

It doesn’t matter what you do as a career or calling, God wants to use you and impact people around you. He wants you as you are, as He designed you to be; nothing less and nothing more. Here is another great quote from Mike Murdoch: “Your life’s assignment is not your decision but your discovery”.

Of course there are some decisions that you have to make to make it all happen. I remember the moment that my husband and I decided to go to VBI-Tulsa; that was a major decision for us and one of the best decisions we have ever made. But it wasn’t easy; our children were 13 and 11. We moved from overseas; they had to learn English, leave their friends behind and make new friends. But our lives have never been the same since.

Decisions are like falling dominoes in a line, each one toppling one irreversible consequence against another. After that we went back to The Netherlands to start a bibleschool, which also was a big decision that we did not regret. Life is too short for regrets. That’s why it is soo important for you to know who you are, what is important to you and what you want to do with your life.

God orders our steps; that means that He is always endeavouring to maneuver you towards your destiny. If you will listen to Him, then you will always be in the right place at the right time with the right people. That’s the reason you need to be sensitive to His leadership.

I believe that God has some extremely exciting things on the horizon for you. No matter how miserable your life may be at this very moment, God has a plan and God’s plan is to turn your life around. Make a choice to not run from Him, when you are distressed and unhappy, then He will and He can turn your situation around. He always knows what to do; He knows exactly what it takes to turn your life around.

What stands between you and your destiny? God’s will for you is always triumph! ALWAYS! 2Cor.2:14. That means that God always wants the very best for your life, no matter how impossible your circumstances look at this very moment. If you stumble and fall seven times, get up again ad go again. Remember, your hard times make you strong!

Satan will come between you and your destiny. He’ll create barriers. He’ll create obstacles, tests and trials because he knows more than you do that God has a powerful plan for your life. He will stand between you and your destiny. He will come up with the most ridiculous situations so that you will be discouraged and want to quit, and never fulfill what God has planned for you.

Let me remind that the difficulties that you are facing today, the thing that is trying to keep you from your destiny today, could become that stepping stone to your greatest victory! Don’t let the devil steal your destiny. God is always there to help you; He will change your whole life. Just as He did with my coach Sandi Krakowski; she is a great example to many.

Never get the idea that your life is no good because you weren’t on drugs or because you hadn’t made a terrible mess of your life. I know people think they don’t have a good testimony because they didn’t experience a whole lot of things. I think that, that is a wonderful testimony and there are people who want to hear it. People are looking for evidence; they are looking for what you have on the inside of you.

If this article is talking to you, it may be time to reexamine what you are doing. You are not meant to live an unfulfilled life. Make sure that you are doing THAT particular thing that is part of your destiny. Don’t spend years and years in a meaningless existence, doing something you dislike, staying there simply because it is convenient and you don’t want to rock the boat. Let me help you to step into your divine destiny; I wrote this book especially for you.

There are many people who have no clue what they are supposed to do in life, don’t let this  be you!
Go and get my book NOW by clicking here!

 

What Did You Think?

Please take a quick moment and leave your comments below.  Thank you!

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Simple Steps to Pay Yourself First

July 25, 2011 by 13 Comments
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Many of our readers that completed our survey told us that they would love to read more on money issues. I am pleased to tell you that my friend Beau Henderson with whom I did The RichLife Fast Track 30 Day Coaching Program, as some of you will remember, was more than willing to be  our guest today at The Choice Driven Life.

I have learned a lot of things from him lately all around making the right choices for our financial life as well. One choice that we should make and that would give our fnances a boost, you will learn from him today.

I am so glad to introduce Beau to you our valuable readers. I am very blessed to know Beau and even more honored when he said yes when I asked him to be our guest on the blog today.

You will learn a principle that is definitely going to change your life, if you apply it.

Enjoy today’s article by Beau Henderson!!

 

 

You are the most important asset that you have. Take care of yourself.

 

Simple Steps to Pay Yourself First

by Beau Henderson

 

Are you saving regularly?

Many people never save because they think it is too complicated, but the concept of saving is really quite simple.  Developing the discipline of saving is what takes a little work.

The three reasons I hear most for not being able to save are: I don’t make enough, I’ll save what’s left, and I have too much debt.
Do you relate to any of these reasons for not saving?

Let’s examine these excuses together, one at a time, and find out how you can start to pay yourself first.  The good news is that You can begin to save now, today, because paying yourself first is a mindset and a habit that has nothing to do with the size of your paycheck.

Reason #1: I don’t make enough money…

There are two kinds of people – those who save now and those who wait. The employee who makes $2,000 a month and gets in the habit of putting $50 of it away will have $600 saved by the end of the year. The same employee who waits until they can “save more” will have $0. And after 10 years, they still won’t have anything saved, and will still be waiting to have enough to save.
Are You Playing the “When I/Then I” Game?

It goes something like this… “When I can save $200 a month, then I will start to put away money for the future”.  The problem with this game is that it rarely, if ever works and our nature is to always create the next “When I/Then I” scenario instead of developing the habit needed to be successful with money.
Get into the habit of setting aside a portion of what you make now.

It doesn’t matter how little, it can be $5 or $5000. The important thing is to get in the habit. If you can bump up that amount annually by at least 3% or $25 a check as your pay increases, and in ten years, you’ll be saving at least $250 a paycheck. But it will never add up like that unless you get started.

Reason #2 I’ll save what’s left…

And typically what’s left is nothing. It happens to everyone. Saving won’t happen if you approach it this way. It is human nature to spend what is there, so don’t even give yourself the option. Take out the amount first, before you’ve even see it. Have it automatically deducted if you can, and put it into a separate account. Once you get in the habit of doing this, you won’t even miss it.
Put it on Auto Pilot For Success

To be successful at paying yourself first make savings automatic.  Your company’s 401k, 403b, SEP, or other retirement plan can deduct a percentage of your income pre-tax from your paycheck.  You can set up an automatic draft to fund after tax savings like ROTH IRAs, brokerage accounts, and savings accounts.  You have to plan for real life  and can set up automatic drafts to fill up separate buckets for emergency savings, car fund, house maintenance.
Reward Yourself to Stay on Track

All of this automatic saving is great, but if you want to stay on track you have to build in some rewards for all of your disciplined hard work.  Most successful clients build in buckets or automatic accounts to fill up for things like a road trip to see the grandkids, an annual trip to Vegas, or a deep sea fishing trip with the guys.

Remember, financial success is about living well.  These memorable experiences are priceless and need to be planned and saved for or else we are right back to playing the “When I/Then I” game in this area as well.

Reason #3 I have too much debt…

The truth is those that have the discipline to pay themselves first get out of debt faster.

Debt won’t go away unless you pay it off and nothing will get saved unless you start now. So split the difference. Come up with a formula that works for you.   People that have a succesful relationship with money create a formula using these 4 components:

Example:

1.      An amount you can live off – 70%

2.      An amount to save – 10%

3.      An amount to go towards debt – 10%

4.      An amount to give away – 10%

If you need every penny, the breakdown can be 97%, 1%, 1%, 1%.

What happens when the debt is gone?  You’ll be able to increase your savings without having to change your lifestyle or spend a penny more.

Paying yourself first puts the focus where it should be – on the person whom the money was meant to serve. In my experience, it is never the behavior of the investment that makes the difference so much as the behavior of the investor.

You are the most important asset that you have. Take care of yourself. It might be hard at first, but getting into the habit now will result in easier saving tomorrow. This is one of the core principals necessary to building a RichLife. It is my most sincere hope that you achieve yours.

What is your biggest obstacle when it comes to paying yourself first?

 

Beau Henderson is a financial advisor, author, coach, radio personality, and CEO of RichLife Advisors. He has helped over 3,000 clients to not just improve their relationship with money, but to live the life of their dreams.  For more tips on how you can apply the principal of wise stewardship to your everyday life, get a copy of Beau’s newest book, The RichLife – 10 Investments for True Wealth.

 

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How to Have a Thought-Life You Can Be Proud Of

July 21, 2011 by 9 Comments
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Our Mind Can Be Like Those Old Typewriters


How to Have a Thought-life You Can Be Proud Of

by Olga Hermans

 

In Deut 30:19, God says, “I have set before you life and death, blessing and curses; therefore choose life.” He gives us an option, but He wants us to do the choosing.  A choice often means we can go the easy way or the hard way.  We can go the way we feel like going or we can go the way we know is right. To make a right and wise choice means we will probably have to discipline ourselves to do something we don’t feel like doing, but know is best.

As the Bible tells us, discipline doesn’t bring immediate joy, but it does bring lasting joy later on. The enemy is always out to destroy us and he often tries to do that by influencing us to make bad choices – to choose to do what feels good or is easy now, instead of what will be beneficial in the long run.

These choices may temporarily satisfy the flesh, but they don’t please God or satisfy us permanently. We should discipline ourselves to make good choices that honor God and His Word. God encourages His children to walk in the Spirit and the way we do that is by choosing to take time to listen to the Holy Spirit and do what we know is right even if it doesn’t feel good.

We’ve all known or know a time when we were in a disagreement with somebody and the air was filled with tension. You can choose to apologize and do what will restore peace or you can choose to stay angry and wait for the other to apologize; we have all been there.

So, what is more important? To be right or to choose for peace? The answer is that it is the right thing to make peace and if we don’t, we are sinning. God is our vindicator and if we need to be shown to be in the right, He will take care of that, but our part is to honor Him by doing what we know is right according to His Word. God can always work out the details but we need to make that quality choice to keep the peace.

You have to realize now more than anything that making right choices is the key to a happy life, and keeping our minds on right things is another one. Don’t let your mind wander around and do whatever it pleases. We have been given the spirit of discipline and self-control. You have been given a sound mind.

I love to sit beside my husband when we are riding down the road; I like to look out of the passenger side window while my husband is driving. He would give a smile if he would be reading this :), but my mind can go off on a drift or wander off onto something that is totally worthless and will not produce anything good in my life.

That doesn’t make me a bad person; it just means I have a choice to make. Will I be lazy and let it “drift”, or will I once again discipline myself to stop thinking that wrong thought and find something good and noble to think about?

I once heard an analogy that someone made; she said our mind can be like those old typewriters. We are focussing on something and our mind starts to wander away from us just like that handle on the typerwriter. I know this typewriter probably tells you my age more than anything else, but, when you start typing, that handle would go all the way to the right and you had to push it back to start e new line.

That is how our mind works, we are in a conversation or something, or reading a book or whatever we do and our mind wanders off…outside the window and we have to push it back just like that old typewriter. Do you get the picture?

My mind can drift when I am in a conversation with my husband, but it also happens when others are speaking and what they are saying really isn’t that interesting to me. It seems to be important to them, but it isn’t to me. My mind starts to drift to thoughts like: “I really have some more important things to do. Or, this is boring… or this goes way too far, I cannot believe this.” Things like that? Oh, you ever thought those things?

Then suddenly a message from my pastor or somebody comes up that we have to treat other people the way we like to be treated. Ouch!! We need to make the other person feel valuable, because they are. So, I am faced with a choice: do I walk in love and show respect for the person talking to me, or do I just pretend that I am listening while I have these wandering thoughts?

Are you surprised that these thoughts happen to me? Let me tell you a secret: they happen to everyone. We are not bad people because bad thoughts come to us but if we don’t resist them, we can become whatever we choose to focus our thoughts on.

The Bible tells us to seek good (1Thess 5:15). Seek means to make an attempt. We all have to seek to think right thoughts. It takes discipline and training, but we can do it. Determine today to set your mind on right things and discipline yourself to keep it set on them and you will enjoy the great and powerful life God has in mind for you.

When you find yourself stuck in a”wandering away” thought that is detrimental to you and you have a hard time staying focussed; get busy doing something good to bless someone. One thing you should not do is stay passive and merely wish you could get it off your mind. Be aggressive and refuse to lend your mind to the devil for his activity.

Remember that bad thoughts lead to bad moods and bad decisions, so don’t waste your time on anything that doesn’t add to the quality of your life. Think on that typewriter, I have to do that many times. 😉

You know, if we are deciding on what we think on or decide where our thoughts go; it all comes down to making decisions. We have to make a choice to activate our will to stay focused. Learn How to Make Decisions Like an Expert in 7 Easy Steps by reading our FREE Report.
Click here to receive it.

You can subscribe to The Daily Choice which brings an encouraging message 5 days a week to your inbox by clicking here

 

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How to Manage Your Happiness by Keeping Yourself Sane

July 18, 2011 by 9 Comments
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God Does Not Want You To Sacrifice Your Happiness To Keep Somebody Else Happy

 

How to Manage Your Happiness by Keeping Yourself

By Olga Hermans

 

Oh, how important it is to keep yourself happy and not be living to please everybody else. How easy we can get in that habit of taking on a false sense of responsibility, thinking that it is our job to keep everybody happy. Of course, it is always good to reach out to others and to try to help as many people as possible.

Do you sense the “but” coming? Too often, though, we get out of balance. We’re doing everything for everybody else, but we’re not taking the time to keep ourselves healthy and happy. God does not want you to sacrifice your happiness to keep somebody else happy.

Your first priority is to take care of yourself. I don’t mean to the extent of being selfish and only me, me, me. That is not what I am saying, but I am saying that you cannot be responsible for someone else’s poor choices. If you do, before long, that person will be controlling you and manipulating you.

I think we all know how that feels. God has not called you to be unhappy simply to keep somebody else happy. Truth is, some people don’t want to be helped; they don’t want to change. They just like the attention. Sometimes, the best thing you can do for somebody like that is not to help them.

I remember the time with my oldest sister, who lives in The Netherlands and is mentally ill. I don’t know how she did it, but she could make me feel so guilty if I wouldn’t do that particular thing that pleased her. A few years ago there was a time that I called her every day at the same time and spoke scriptures into her mind. She so enjoyed it and it looked like she was doing so much better.

Anyway, my husband and I were going to a conference in Dallas. She told me how afraid she was to not have me call her and this and that. So, ok I told her I would call every day. I think the 2nd or 3rd time I called her at our agreed time to hear from the front desk that she had gone to a movie. That was the moment that I started to realize I had to do things differently although she was mentally ill.

Life is too short to go through it being controlled and manipulated by people who refuse to make good choices on their own. You are not responsible for everybody else’s happiness. If people are controlling you, it’s not their fault; it’s your fault. You must learn to set some boundaries. Quit allowing them to call you at all hours of the day and night to dump their problems on you.

Many people are all upset, frustrated and discouraged because they’ve made a wrong choice of taking on way too much responsibility for somebody close to them who won’t do what is right. They carry a heavy load, trying to keep someone else happy.

You can be free from all that if you will just give those people to God. Quit trying to be the keeper of the universe. That is not your job. Of course, is not easy at first. My decision towards my sister was very hard on me, but I had to do it. I am not talking about selfish or self-centeredness. We should be givers and care for each other. But there is a big difference between giving and allowing somebody to control you and make you feel guilty until you do what they want.

To reduce stress, be aware of high-maintenance people in your life. Some people are almost impossible to keep happy. Maybe this is a turning point for you. If you have been living to please everybody else, or constantly trying to fix everything, rid yourself of that false sense of responsibility. Yes, be kind and compassionate and yes you should reach out to others. It’s like the saying that says: “you can’t help anybody who won’t help themselves”.

You gotta run your race and not let people control you and manipulate you; you will not only have less stress and more time and energy, but I also believe you will be much happier, and you will be free to fulfill the best plan that God has for you.

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How to Improve Your Decision Making Skills to Make Better Choices

July 14, 2011 by 5 Comments
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Many Times Our Dreams Do Not Become Reality Because Of The Decisions We Make In Our Lives

 

How to Improve Your Decision Making Skills

to Make Better Choices

by Olga Hermans

 

As I was pondering about my next post for this week, being extremely busy with the writing of my eBook “Pursue Your Destiny with Passion and Purpose” and also giving a new look to my FREE Report I thought about how so very important it is to take our God-given destiny serious and to be able to improve our decision making skills so we will NOT regret our choices.

So, I want to give you 5 crucial components to help you step into your destiny by making decisions that matter.

1.  Research: gathering information and collecting data

Gathering facts is very important in making a good decision that you will not regret. Let’s say you want to buy a product that is completely new to you – say a cleaner that you could use on your granite countertops without scratching them. Here you are in the store and a decision is right in front of you.

Have you ever wondered why some of the vitamins that you take are so outrageously expensive?

There is something like research and development. In order to know their target audience, the habits and preferences of their customers, companies spend vast amounts of money each year doing research to develop a new product.

So, how much research and development have you put into the decisions you make? Particularly the decisions with lifelong ripple effects that will move you toward your Destiny? Have you conducted adequate research into the character of that person that you might marry to make sure that s/he is who s/he says s/he is? I hope you see how important research is. Let’s get to the next point, shall we?

2.   Responsibility

Being responsible is something a lot of people don’t know much about. God’s definition of a dreamer is not someone who sits around with his head in the clouds, but it is someone who sees the possibilities of great things and understands it will take a lot of hard work and determination to see it through to the finish.

People that pursue their destiny with passion and purpose are people who are willing to sacrifice and pay the price up front in order to cross the finish line with self-respect and honor. Lazy people are always unhappy and they don’t understand why.

The reason they’re unhappy is because God didn’t create people just so they could sit around and do nothing, bearing no good fruit. We need to be engaged in life. If we want to see change in our life, then we need to ask ourselves what choices we can make to change things.

3.   Rising Higher

God’s plan for each of our lives is that we continually rise to new levels. But how we go about in life, and how much of God’s favour and blessings we experience, will be directly related to how much we decide to follow His directions.

Throughout life, God will deal with us and bring areas to light where we need to make choices to improve. He often speaks to us through our conscience or through a still small voice. He knows the things that are holding us back.

He knows our weaknesses, faults and the inner secrets that we keep hidden. When He brings these matters to our attention and if we want to get closer to our destiny, we have to be willing to face the truth about ourselves and take the correction that God brings to us.

4.  Root Issues; dealing with them

We love to fix things on the surface, like cleaning up our behaviour, trying to be more friendly, more loving and kind. Not spending so much money, or stop using credit cards to buy something on impulse. Not manipulating people any more, not getting so angry and upset. It is a good thing to make choices to try to improve, but so often we are not dealing with the real source of the problem.

People can have a root of insecurity that causes them to feel defensive or have a root of bitterness. Perhaps you have been spinning your wheels, going around in circles year after year, and are not really happy. You need to be honest enough to say, “God, show me what it is. Am I relying on other people to make me happy? Do I have unrealistic expectations?”

“Am I going to be happy only if I get married? Am I allowing my circumstances to keep me down? God, show me the truth about myself.” Some people say, “I’m depressed because my parents were so depressed”. No, you can change. You are a child of God, so you have the greatest power in the universe on the inside of you. You can break any addiction and overcome any stronghold.

You can fulfill your God-given destiny. You may have a negative history, but please understand, you don’t have to have a negative future. What’s important is not where you come from. What matters is where you are going. One of the main ways we can honor God is by taking responsibility for our choices, not blaming our past, not blaming our circumstances. We must get down to the root, take responsibility. Rise up and do something with it. You can experience the good things of God and fulfill your destiny.

5. Rearview: looking back and adjusting as necessary to stay on course

It is an amazing fact but true: the decisions we make today don’t simply affect ourselves; they affect our children and our children’s children for multiplied generations. The Bible talks about how the iniquity of the fathers can be passed down for three to four generations. That means that bad habits, addictions, negativity, wrong mind-sets and other types of iniquities can be passed down.

It is time to rise up and make a decision to do something about it. It may have been there for years, but the good news is it doesn’t have to stay there. You can be the one to put a stop to it. You can be the one to choose the blessing and not the curse. We’ve heard a lot about the generational curse, but equally important is our generational choice.

We don’t have to stay the way we are. Put a stop to any of the negative patterns in your family’s bloodline. It is a spiritual battle. You must take authority over all the strongholds that are keeping you in bondage. One of the first things you must do is recognize what it is, identify it, get it out in the open and deal with it. As you do you will see God’s blessings and favour in your life and you will be able to make the decisions that bring you closer and closer to your destiny. This will definitely help you improve your decision making skills and to know without a shadow of a doubt how to make good choices in discovering the life you were born to live.

Tweet this: Destiny is no matter of chance It is a matter of choice It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved WJB #TheDailyChoice

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How to Be Emotionally Strong – Gaining Control Over Your Emotions

June 30, 2011 by 12 Comments
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Most People Approach Life Like A Roller-Coaster Ride At An Amusement Park


How to Be Emotionally Strong –
Gaining Control Over Your Emotions

By Olga Hermans

 

The other day I was at a party and we were all chatting along and all of a sudden the question came up: “isn’t anyone happy anymore?” Actually there was a male in our group and started sharing with us that he dates women frequently, but the relationships always seem to end the same way. He said, “All the women I meet don’t just have so much emotional baggage, they have cargo!”

Do you have friends who have these emotions like: resentment and bitterness, depression, grief, gloom and despair? We all have emotions, but I believe one of the main goals of every person should be emotional stability. We should seek God to learn how to manage our emotions and not allow them to manage us.

God wants you to use wisdom. Before you do something, wisdom says wait a little while until the emotions settle down, then check to see if you really believe it’s the right thing to do. The Bible says in Colossians 3:15 to be led by peace in making decisions. Don’t let your emotions make your decisions. A good statement to remember is this: “Wisdom says wait; emotions say hurry.

Most people (I am not talking about you and I) approach life like a roller-coaster ride at an amusement park. They allow their lives to happen to them. They strap themselves in and with grim determination; they hang on during the ups, downs, excitement and fear. They don’t have a clue how much stress they have on the inside of them.

The longer the ride lasts, the more accustomed they become to the knots in their stomachs and the tension in their neck. We seem to have forgotten that there might be a different way to live. I don’t know about you, but when I get off a roller-coaster ride, I feel very wobbly in the knees. An emotional roller coaster can also cause a person to be a little wobbly – unsure, unstable, stressed-out, weak and incapable of functioning to the fullest.

Emotional roller coasters sap people of physical and psychological health, often leaving the mind and the body almost without energy and strength.

I have said this before that I had a sister who died due to anorexia. I remember the time that she started this deadly behaviour. I was only 14 and she was 17/18; she was not happy for who knows what the reason was. She started to have these emotional outbursts of anger and bitterness. There was a time that it looked like the emotions started to settle down, but the fact was that she started to cope with it by starving herself and not giving herself room to be who she really was. It had an effect on our whole family.

My other sister got married, seemed to be very happy on the outside. After my parents had died she became depressed and suicidal; very angry and bitter at everybody around her. Her emotions became too much for her, because she didn’t learn how to manage her emotions but allowed them to manage her. At this moment she and one of her daughters are in a mental hospital.

Do you want to know what happened to me? During a time of deep distress in my life God came and visited me in my own home, He picked me up and delivered me out of darkness into His marvellous light. He changed me on the inside, delivered me completely from smoking 2 packages of cigarettes a day and from nail biting instantly, He also completely healed my marriage. Of course there were and are some areas that I have to work through. He never told us that life would be easy, but if we do life together with Him, life is so much easier.

I am telling you all this because I know that emotions can be very deadly and very toxic. Many people suffer depression, fear, worry, stress and try to cope with it. Mother Teresa said that the greatest disease of mankind is the absence of love. I couldn’t agree more. Your answer to you feeling like this is that you start to realize that you are valuable and priceless.

The Bible encourages us strongly that we are to love others as we love ourselves. Matth.22:39 and Lev. 19:18. You know, to be able to love begins in receiving God’s love and then learning to love ourselves. How are you able to love yourself? By having feelings of worthiness, value and purpose in life.

“You are beautiful!” Is this a compliment to you? Well, it was meant to be, because YOU ARE beautiful. God says that about you! You are valuable to Him; He loves you as nobody else can love you.Whoever you are and wherever you are, you are precious, priceless and extremely important to an amazing God in heaven. He knows your name. He sees your life and he cares about the inner desires of your heart.

Walking in love is a choice and acting on that choice takes effort. Love means that you turn yourself inside out for others, to turn your thinking upside down from the way the vast majority of people in the world think. A person who makes a commitment to walk in love is a person who nearly always discovers he has made a very extreme decision. Walking in love requires not only an intentional, initial choice, but an ongoing intentional choice.

Loving as God loves requires practice, practice, practice. Practice and not being jealous, proud, rude, or selfish and you are on your way to attain happiness and live the life you desire.

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How Do You See Yourself?

May 16, 2011 by 9 Comments
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Don’t Put Yourself In A Box By Limiting Yourself To Just Existing

 

How Do You See Yourself?

by Olga Hermans

 

Can you answer this question: “How do you see yourself”? It is very important how you see yourself, because it has everything to do with your destiny. First, you have to absolutely know that God loves you; you have to be convinced that He loves you. When you get a revelation of how much God cares about you, you’re going to get a greater respect for yourself.

In the eyes of God, your success is NOT dependent upon your circumstances. In the eyes of God, your success is dependent upon how you see yourself.

If you think you’re a failure, you will fail. If you think you can win through the power of God that dwells within you, then you will win. It’s up to you. It’s your choice.

Satan has been able to paint a picture on the inside of you of the way you see yourself. He has been doing this already for many years and I must say he has done a good job, isn’t it? However, if you want to live in victory, then you must begin to discover who you are in Christ; God’s image.I ask you again: “How do you see yourself”?

Most people don’t like themselves. Some don’t like themselves for various reasons. I didn’t like myself growing up. I had two older sisters who got all the attention; I was always the little one running behind them trying to catch some of leftovers so to speak. They got all the extras.

It was until I gave my life to the Lord May 15, 1989; the day of my natural birth and my spiritual birth. Since then I started to like myself; that season of my life had brought a huge change in my life. Before that time I was searching and searching but in the wrong direction. I was in self-help groups and New Age thinking. God showed Himself to me and let me know how much I needed Him while I was in that group. It was a beautiful thing and a few months later I came out of new age and was born again on May 15th. My life has never been the same.

Anyway, back to not liking ourselves. It is a terrible way to live when you go through life not liking yourself much less loving yourself. Yeah, you should fall in love with you. You have qualities that nobody else has. You are unique. No one else can be exactly like you. Every person has something unique about him or her. Let me ask you again: “How do you see yourself”?

The bible says ….you shall love your neighbor as yourself. Matthew 19:19

How can you do that if you don’t even love yourself? When you love yourself, then what you are saying is, I accept me as who I am. God made me. I am not a mistake. Don’t put yourself down and condemn yourself when you love yourself. When you love yourself, you are saying, I am worth something. You are saying, I have something to offer.

We have all made mistakes in our lives and we should take full responsibility for them, but hanging on to them will not make our lives better. At some point, you have to make the choice to forgive yourself whether anyone else does or not.

Maybe you are somebody who is always down on yourself and feeling as if you’re worthless. Or you constantly tell yourself that you cannot be trusted with anything important because you might “mess things up”. Or you’ll become so mentally paralyzed that you won’t allow yourself to even think about taking a risk or stepping out in faith because you’re afraid that you’ll “blow it” again.

That way your self-esteem is almost nonexistent. Let’s be honest here, do you truly think that you will ever enjoy any high degree of success when your life is in that condition? No, you won’t! You have put yourself in a box. You have already determined your future. You’ve limited yourself to just existing – not living.

The abundant life that Jesus says is yours will never materialize if you refuse to let go of the mistakes. Let them go now and learn from them. Be wiser in the future; don’t make the same mistake twice. You have more information now than perhaps you had when you made the mistakes.

Apply the knowledge that you gained from experiences and get on with your life. Don’t let what happened in the past hold you back any longer. It can absolutely paralyze your life.

Look at your mistakes and wrong choices as new information about what works and what doesn’t work. Learn from it and move on. The main thing is this: DON’T LET THEM HOLD YOU BACK. In order for you to enjoy a bright future, it is absolutely necessary that you forget the past.

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Make A Choice For The Household Of Faith

February 18, 2011 by 1 Comment
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Make A Choice For The Household Of Faith

Make A Choice For The Household Of Faith

by Olga Hermans

 

Economy is defined as the management of resources of a country or a community. For a believer, economy can be defined as God’s divine plan for the blessing. A vital part of that plan is financial freedom and overflowing abundance.

Believers are not subject to the world’s economy when they follow God’s direction. An obedient believer can thrive when economic challenges are creating havoc in the world.

Pro 14:11 The house of the wicked shall be overthrown: but the tabernacle of the upright shall flourish.
Psa 52:8 But I am like a green (green = flourishing) olive tree in the house of God: I trust in the mercy of God for ever and ever.

You can declare this: “we are like a green olive tree in the house of God”; we are flourishing! Even if this is not the case in your life right now; you may be under intense pressure right now, you need to begin to peak words of faith! That is what we do in the household of faith! You live in the household of faith, don’t you and you are not moving out aren’t you? Well, then speak out loud!!

That’s what we do in the household of faith!

Psa 112:3  Wealth and riches shall be in his house: and his righteousness endureth for ever. Everything is going to be ALL-Right in the household of faith and we flourish! Speak: “wealth and riches are in our house”. God will fill up your home with precious and pleasant riches. The Blessing is upon your and my household!

Jer 17:7 -8 Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the LORD is. For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreadeth out her roots by the river, and shall not see when heat cometh, but her leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit.

The person that is blessed and the person that trusts the Lord shall be like a tree planted by the waters. That is what we have to do in these times; this might be the toughest thing to do in these times. We look at what is going on and it breeds fear.

The news tells us how bad the times are and how bad the times are going to be. You should press the pause button for a moment and speak out loud: “we are flourishing, we are growing, we are enlarging, we trust in God and our hope is in Him!” Have a praise session right at that very moment. If you are going to watch the news; you are going to have to talk back to it.

We are like trees planted by the rivers of water and we flourish even in times of drought. It is impossible in the natural for trees to flourish in drought, but they can with God. It is a supernatural action. We are a picture of Isaac in that time of famine where he sowed and reaped the hundredfold return. That is a picture of us.

Jer.17:8 says: his leaves shall be green and when you research the Hebrew, it means prospering and thriving and flourishing. No matter what is going on, we never stop producing fruit.

Psa 36:7-9  How precious is Your steadfast love, O God! The children of men take refuge and put their trust under the shadow of Your wings. We relish and feast on the abundance of Your house; (So, in the household of faith, we relish and feast on His abundance. ) and You cause them to drink of the stream of Your pleasures.
For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light do we see light.

Son 2:4  He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love. In the household of faith we flourish because it is a banqueting house.

Pro 11:28  He that trusteth in his riches shall fall: but the righteous shall flourish as a branch.

We do not trust in riches, we trust in God and we flourish!

Psa 27:4  One thing have I desired of the LORD, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to enquire in his temple.

You know what you need to do? You need to get all these scriptures on the inside of you by meditating them over and over again until they are yours! When do you know that they are yours? When they start speaking back to you throughout the day! You have to get them down on the inside of you; especially in these times. It is imperative that you keep the word of God transforming your thinking!

It’s up to you; it’s that time for making the right choices. The power of Choice is calling for you! 🙂

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